Hey, I thought these were cute!!!
100 Tips For Moms
MOM'S HINT #001: Cut off the crusts.
MOM'S HINT #002: Make real cocoa.
MOM'S HINT #003: Hang their drawings on the fridge.
MOM'S HINT #004: Say the clay ashtray is what you always wanted.
MOM'S HINT #005: Sing silly songs.
MOM'S HINT #006: Make goofy faces.
MOM'S HINT #007: Let them take off the training wheels.
MOM'S HINT #008: Remind the Tooth Fairy about inflation.
MOM'S HINT #009: Buy a good stain remover. MOM'S HINT #010: Let them keep the kitten. MOM'S HINT #011: Remember when YOU misbehaved.
MOM'S HINT #012: If you don't know, say so. MOM'S HINT #013: Let grandma spoil them. MOM'S HINT #014: Let them stay up just a little bit longer.
MOM'S HINT #015: Lock up the good china. MOM'S HINT #016: Tickle.
MOM'S HINT #017: Be a good sport.
MOM'S HINT #018: Be a good friend.
MOM'S HINT #019: Smile when your mother-in-law gives you advice.
MOM'S HINT #020: ALL mothers are working mothers.
MOM'S HINT #021: Ultimatums don't work.
MOM'S HINT #022: Bribes work.
MOM'S HINT #023: Hysteria will get you nowhere.
MOM'S HINT #024: Their first summer at camp is murder.
MOM'S HINT #025: Let them lick the spoon. MOM'S HINT #026: Learn lots of lullabies. MOM'S HINT #027: Breastfeeding in public goes over better in Europe.
MOM'S HINT #028: Learn to handle sleep deprivation.
MOM'S HINT #029: Have an answer ready for "Where do babies come from?"
MOM'S HINT #030: Don't flinch when they grow taller than you.
MOM'S HINT #031: Going to college don't mean they won't come back.
MOM'S HINT #032: Don't teach them to parallel park.
MOM'S HINT #033: Be consistent.
MOM'S HINT #034: Think quick.
MOM'S HINT #035: Improvise.
MOM'S HINT #036: Sympathize.
MOM'S HINT #037: Remember: It's just a phase.
MOM'S HINT #038: "Wait till your father gets home" is a cop-out.
MOM'S HINT #039: "Because I said so" is a good reason.
MOM'S HINT #040: Never tell them how much they'll inherit.
MOM'S HINT #041: Teach them four precious words: "We can't afford it.".
MOM'S HINT #042: Carry Wash'n Dri.
MOM'S HINT #043: Smile when you change that diaper.
MOM'S HINT #044: It's absolutely okay to say "No".
MOM'S HINT #045: Buy chunky peanut butter in jumbo jars.
MOM'S HINT #046: Run a credit line at the toy store.
MOM'S HINT #047: Forget suede.
MOM'S HINT #048: Teachers ARE underpaid. MOM'S HINT #049: Learn the rules of football. MOM'S HINT #050: Teach them to write thank you notes.
MOM'S HINT #051: Your teenage daughter WILL find you embarrassing.
MOM'S HINT #052: Cheese food is not cheese. MOM'S HINT #053: Thirteen is too late to put them up for adoption.
MOM'S HINT #054: Potty training builds character (yours.)
MOM'S HINT #055: Sibling rivalry builds character (theirs.)
MOM'S HINT #056: Worry, worry, worry.
MOM'S HINT #057: Childbirth is not for wimps. MOM'S HINT #058: Stretch marks are a badge of honor.
MOM'S HINT #059: Half your brain leaves with the placenta.
MOM'S HINT #060: Donate pre-pregnancy jeans to charity.
MOM'S HINT #061: Don't read the label on baby formula.
MOM'S HINT #062: With luck, they'll call you once a week when they leave.
MOM'S HINT #063: With luck, they won't call collect.
MOM'S HINT #064: With luck, they'll pay for their own therapy when grown.
MOM'S HINT #065: No matter what, they'll always be your babies.
MOM'S HINT #066: The older they get, the wiser you'll seem.
MOM'S HINT #067: Just when you've got them figured out, they change.
MOM'S HINT #068: Kiss it and make it better. MOM'S HINT #069: Make ice cube popsicles. MOM'S HINT #070: If you promised, do it. MOM'S HINT #071: Watch what you promise. MOM'S HINT #072: When in doubt, say "We'll see."
MOM'S HINT #073: Bunk beds are cool.
MOM'S HINT #074: You'll sometimes act just like YOUR mother.
MOM'S HINT #075: Buy Permapress.
MOM'S HINT #076: Use the honor system.
MOM'S HINT #077: You can only shoot so much videotape.
MOM'S HINT #078: Pose good questions.
MOM'S HINT #079: Colic happens.
MOM'S HINT #080: Cowlicks happen.
MOM'S HINT #081: Look what being a martyr got Joan of Arc.
MOM'S HINT #082: A dishwasher is not a luxury.
MOM'S HINT #083: The new math is harder than the old math.
MOM'S HINT #084: Let's hear it for leftovers. MOM'S HINT #085: Don't leave their teddy bear behind.
MOM'S HINT #086: Learn to make daisy chains.
MOM'S HINT #087: Not everyone can be a valedictorian.
MOM'S HINT #088: They're never too old to scold.
MOM'S HINT #089: They're never too big to hug.
MOM'S HINT #090: They're never too smart to receive some good advice.
MOM'S HINT #091: They're never too rich to take home your leftovers.
MOM'S HINT #092: Don't remind your grown son you changed his diapers.
MOM'S HINT #093: If they grow up to be doctors, take the credit.
MOM'S HINT #094: If they grow up to be lawyers, don't take the blame.
MOM'S HINT #095: If they become pro-athletes, take the house & car.
MOM'S HINT #096: If they become politicians they were switched at birth.
MOM'S HINT #097: Don't teach the kids your fear of bugs.
MOM'S HINT #098: Take them to a petting zoo. MOM'S HINT #099: Don't use a pediatrician who isn't a parent.
MOM'S HINT #100: You can never have too many Kleenex.
Boozy
(more to come)