Recently, I received information about the top secret post-armageddon plans the society has in place. You may have heard rumors about these plans before and what work is being formulated for each congregation. This information comes from a "heavy" uncle of mine, a 7th generation Witness himself, and grandson of the designer of the society's aborted attempt to produce a portable cinematic projection system for the door-to-door ministry in the 1930's.
Letter # 238 Dated April 1, 1971
To the Rapid City, SD, Congregation of Jehovah's Witnesses
Dear Brothers,
Your work assignment for the next 250 years is to clean up the defaced mountain in your locality, the former Mount Rushmore. This mountain, renamed Mountain of the Chosen, is to be restructured and the society's art department has designed the facing with appropriate "Glorious" ones.
We trust that you will carry out this assignment diligently and we look forward to viewing the results in the coming centuries.
Your brothers,
Watchtower
Enclosure: Anticipated scheme to be followed
'To avoid criticism, say nothing, do nothing, be nothing'