He's DEAD. ...killed!!

by biblexaminer 4 Replies latest jw friends

  • biblexaminer
    biblexaminer

    I saw brother Bob whack a hitchhiker on the head with a shovel. The guy is is dead!

    But! Seems nobody is missing this fella, so brother Bob wants to just forget about it. I went to the elders to tell them that brother Bob did this, but they said "Are their TWO witnesses?" I answered "No." So they said, we cannot take any action against Brother Bob, and you should drop the matter.

    But I said "He's commited a crime." To which they answered "Brother Bob is a fine upstanding member of the congregation and if you refuse to drop this matter, then we will have to form a judicial comitte and discuss your possible disfellowshipping".

    What to do... what to do...

    Any news on the other crimes, like those molesting children?

  • ianao
    ianao

    I KNOW!!!!

    There ARE two witnesses... One is you, and the other is...

    **THE GUY**.

    Tell brother Bob that he should not bare false witness to himself and be a bad "witness" by not confessing his sin to the elders.

    Remind him that he is a Super-Duper-Jew(tm) instead of a Christian anyway and that you will have to "slay" him for not confessing!!!!

    Ask him if that is what Jesus would do!!!!

    Wait! I know...

    Since the other guy is dead... Just have a gypsy talk to his spirit in front of the elders. Your word and his word should be enough to let the elders continue playing judgeie and have all their fun by slapping the bloody murderer on the wrist.

  • biblexaminer
    biblexaminer

    The elders said "Theirs no law here that says they, thew elders, have to report this to the authorities".... So they went on to say that "There is nothing stopping me from telling the authorities"... but then they qualified that by saying "We would still have to make a Judicial Comitte to discuss YOUR accusations".

    Boy, I hope they find the body. Can they tell if it was raped.. I mean killed.

  • StifflersErSlayersBrother
    StifflersErSlayersBrother

    You saw brother Bob kill another guy too? Cmon, ill tellem that I saw it too, then lets see what they do.

  • metatron
    metatron

    Hey, I saw him kill a completely different guy at a
    different time (with a different shovel)!

    That doesn't count either does it?

    metatron

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