"HAVE YOU SEEN MY MOTHER?" I don't think I'll ever be the same again....

by SWALKER 8 Replies latest jw friends

  • SWALKER
    SWALKER

    Yesterday, I recieved and read Bryan's book, "Have You Seen My Mother?" and that book effected me so deeply and profoundly, that I don't think I'll ever quite be the same person I was before. It's like one of those defining moments in your life...it will never leave me. I wish that I was close enough to give Bryan a hug in person and wish somehow that I could give back to him his lost childhood.

    I know that many of us have sad childhoods to remember or try not to remember and it should make us all strive to be better parents and grandparents. We should step in should we ever see a situation that we feel isn't right and at least make sure that kids are safe and o.k.

    My son recently saw a woman beating her son in a parking lot with a tennis racket, but was in a hurry to get somewhere. He has deeply regretted that he didn't call 911 or even go stop her! It is still haunting him, but he has now resolved that should he ever encounter that again he will step in and do something.

    That book brought back so many memories of how Witness kids were treated growing up in the "truth." I can only speak of the 60's, as that's when I was a kid, but we were treated to a lot of cruel and unusual punishment. (There were a few good kids that had loving parents, but I think they were the minority.) It was expected that kids work hard, with little time for play, and then all those meetings, service, and home studies. We were expected to excel at school as well...my brothers all brought home straight A's and were commended, but no less than that was expected. Then I came along and got a B...no one said anything, just shook their heads!!! (All A's and 1 B...oh the shame of it!)

    Everyone was expected to BEAT their children...if they were good...just make something up! Kids needed to be BEAT! I remember having to wear clothes that covered up my bruises and marks. Today, that would land parents in jail!

    Almost every meeting, some kid would be taken out and beat so loudly we'd all hear the screams. No one did a thing! Just went on with that DAMN MEETING like nothing was happening.

    I was a runner though. By that I mean that I learned to run when the going got tough. I figured that I'd just as soon get it when I got home after being gone a few hours (maybe they'd have cooled off by then!) and I could play outside until dark and then go in and get it! I'm sure that's why I won either 1st or 2nd place in running competitions at school. See how that helped me out??? (Why get beat early and lose out on precious daylight?) It was mostly my dad that dished out the beatings and I don't think I ever remember why I got it! Sometimes he lined us all up in a row and beat us all, one by one. My two oldest brothers finally had enough one day and took my dad down...that pretty much ended all the beatings!!! (I was ready to lend a hand if needed, actually I had hoped to get a punch in!)

    Bryan I wish I could go door-to-door right behind the Witnesses with your book!!!

    Swalker

  • carla
    carla

    I still have to get that book!!

    So where are all the jw apologists now? What do they have to say? oh, nevermind, I can recite the response myself, 'while what happened to him is unfortunate it should not be a generalization of all jw parents. We love our children and would never harm them!" Yet, I have read too many stories of those jw's who as children were beaten, abused, and emotionally and spiritually abused as well.

  • SWALKER
    SWALKER

    Carla...that's the thing...they BELIEVE they are not hurting their children! Spare the rod, spoil the child....CR#%!!! They are Instructing their children in the cult mindset.

    Swalker

  • Double Edge
    Double Edge

    Sounds like a very interesting read.....hmmmm.... I wonder if anyone on this board can get it to OPRAH?

  • misspeaches
    misspeaches

    Hey yeah I'd love to see Oprah include this book in her list of reads... YOu know that whole book thing she has set up....

  • SWALKER
    SWALKER

    Has anyone e-mailed her the info about the book? Maybe if some of us would contact them, it would get noticed!!! I think that's a great idea...

    Swalker

  • Carmel
    Carmel

    :Physical violence was the norm in my family. All six of my older brothers had some form of extreme pain visited upon them from infancy up to when they left home. I often wondered after leaving home if my one brother that died very young had more happen to him than "fell off the back portch". It was a turning point when I stood up to my father and challenged him if he tried to lay a hand on me. I knew it was time to hit the road. I guess I'll have to break down and buy the book.

    Thanks for sharing your review.l

    carme;l

  • stillAwitness
    stillAwitness

    I never got to read the book. I am really wanting to get it now.

  • SWALKER
    SWALKER

    Here are a couple of places to order it:

    www.HaveYouSeenMyMother.com

    or they have it at Amazon.com

    My mom read the book today, once she started she couldn't put it down either!!! It's very well written and I'm glad I finally got up the courage to read it. What a story!

    Swalker

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