One man's story of domestic abuse turns into a 2,000 mile walk to raise awareness.
To Whom It May Concern;
My name is Frank, I’m 37 years old. My main focus is women and children that are being abused. I have been through it as a child and I’m just now comfortable enough to be willing and able to speak publicly about domestic violence. The big step is to break the silence.
I want to tell you a little about my growing up. I will tell you just the main parts because it would take writing a book to tell you everything. I’m writing this in hopes that someone can help me help others in the same situation that I was in and spread the word that domestic violence will not and should not be tolerated. In writing this, I’m not looking for sympathy, fame or fortune, I just want to help.
Growing up wasn’t fun for me. My real Dad was not around because my mother left him for this other guy which is the monster in my life and my nightmares. My nightmares are getting fewer as I deal with the past and talk about it. As told to me by my older sister, this monster would put a shot of whiskey in my bottle so I would sleep longer and not bother him with my cries to say I was hungry. If I did cry out he would put a rag in my mouth to shut me up. I would also be smacked around throughout the day. When I was 4, it started getting real ugly in our living space (at least I could never call it HOME). I would be brought upstairs to pick up dirt and crumbs off the carpet with my fingers for hours. I said brought upstairs because my sleeping arrangement was the basement floor with nothing but a blanket under me and one to cover with. It was not a nice basement either, it leaked all over and was cold and damp. I didn’t sleep on a bed until I was 12 years old. I would crawl behind a chair when I got tired of picking at the carpet and Mr. Monster would find me and hit me over the head with his long metal flashlight, by the way, he carried it to see because I had to do this in the dark. If I complained, I got beat with any object he could reach and raped me for hours on end and he said “I’ll give you something to cry about, take that you little cry baby”! Sometimes in the middle of the night I would hear my mother crying and thumping around upstairs. I remember one night I heard her scream so loud, I can still hear the screeching noise in my dreams, I went upstairs only because I wasn’t locked up for the night (I don’t know if he forgot or if he meant to let me loose), I found my mother tied up to the bed and a piece of gray tape covering her mouth and he was hitting her with his belt. My little plastic baseball bat (that I had gotten from my aunt as a birthday present) inside her private part and she was bleeding. All I could do was scream. Of course he caught me and taped my mouth shut and tied me to his bed and raped me. He then took me back downstairs to “my basement” and locked me up with my own choker collar and leash. This is where I had to eat my meals, when I did get meals, usually I snuck scraps out of the garbage when I had to do dishes. There were nights he came to get me and bring me out to the garage and tie me up to make me watch as he tied my mother and 2 sisters by their hands to the rafters above, naked and their mouths taped. He would whip them with a fan belt off his old car until the welts would start to bleed. He said if I screamed I was next, so yes of course, I couldn’t help but scream. I was terrified, and I did get the beating next. I was not only terrified for my own life but that as well for my mother and sisters. We were told (all the time) that if we did anything to make him mad or if we told anyone what happens, it would get worse and he might even kill us. And I believed that!
There is so much more but maybe one day I will write about that. It is my hope by telling my life story, I can help any one who suffers from domestic violence escape a dangerous situation and that there is help and hope out there. This is what I’m trying to do now-help the women and children escape.
Domestic violence IS out there and it happens every few seconds of each and every day. As I write this, a woman or child is getting beaten or raped.
End the silence, free yourself from domestic violence.
Thank you for reading my life story and hopefully understanding why I want to help.
Sincerely,
Frank Zalka