You Might Be a JW If ....

Deleted

I never seem to be able to cut and paste stuff. Here it goes again.

http://www.virushead.net/jwhumor.html

If you think that service to God can be measured in hours, you might be a JW.
If you see no problem with arguing that a loving god would never create a hell, while at the same time promoting the idea that this same god is about to kill all non-JW human beings in a fair judgment, you are a JW.
If you feel that it is ethical behavior to shun (rather than counsel) people in your religious group who have committed a sin, you may be a JW.
If you think the name "Jehovah" appeared in the original writings of the Greek Scriptures, you are a JW.
If a biblical statement outright disagrees with what is taught in the Watchtower - but you believe the Watchtower is correct, you are most probably a JW.
If you think demons choose to reside in jewelry, furniture, china, books or blue smurfs, you might be a JW.
If your reaction to someone wearing a cross is the same as a vampire's, you might be a JW.
If you can't pick up anything to read without also picking up something to underline or highlight with, you might be a JW.
If you've spent days at a baseball stadium and never saw a ball or drank a beer, you might be a JW.
If you're always afraid someone might see and hear you when you're finally just being "normal", you might be a JW.
If you can have a Bible study without a Bible, you might be a JW.
If the thought of entering a Christian bookstore sends shivers up and down your spine, you might be a JW.
If you see the title of "All Along the Watchtower" by Jimi Hendrix and you feel spiritually refreshed, but afraid to listen to the song, you might be a JW.
If you think (or used to think) that 1975 was a significant year in an apocalyptic timeline, you are probably a former JW.
If you think you, on your own, misinterpreted or imagined the year 1975 as the year the end would come, thereby absorbing all responsibility away from the Watch Tower Society, you are a JW in good standing.
If you think that a door slamming shut is actually a form of persecution against the righteous, you might be a JW.
If you think the "New World Translation" is the least biased and most accurate translation of the Hebrew and Greek books known collectively as the Bible, you are most likely a JW.
If you think "The Finished Mystery" which was released in 1917 was "meat in due season", you might be a JW (who has obviously never read the book).
If you believe that New Light that becomes Old Light and then becomes New Light again is God's way of doing things, you are a JW.
If the Watch Tower Society used to preach a certain teaching years ago and you deny they ever did, you are a good JW.

kazar

That is a very funny post, Deleted. Thanks. It gave me a good laugh (along with thinking "how true").

lovelylil

Thank you for the laugh tonight! I needed it. Lilly

Fleshybirdfodder

LOL.... The smurf and Jewlery thing got me. Thanks!

FBF

You Might Be a JW If ....

Deleted

Deleted

kazar

lovelylil

Fleshybirdfodder

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