Power is an amazing thing. When you realize you have control over others and people repeat things you say, as authority, that is a feeling that is hard to bottle. Personally, I have served in positions of power at several stages in my life. Management, upper management and even as a Pioneer. People look to you, see what you do and say as something to model their life after or better yet, they kiss up to you and brown nose your butt into making you feel like you could never reach a higher feeling. With this in mind, I am often more amazed when elders leave for reasons of no faith, then any other. As most elders I knew, liked the power. That little circle of people, that had faith in them, gave them a reason to live and made them feel important in a world that often makes us feel smaller then a house fly. I personally feel, that there are elders laying in their bed each night, in that moment just before sleep where your mind thinks about the days events and other deep thought, saying to themselves "this religion is so full of crap" and yet knowing that when they leave they will loose the one thing that matters "POWER" and that is worth more then a winning lottery ticket. Do you honestly believe all the elders stay because of faith? I don't.
Being an elder, about power not faith.
by free2beme 8 Replies latest jw friends
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Confession
free2be... I suppose it's impossible to answer your question conclusively. You express something that others in this forum have as well. And it always comes down to statements such as "most elders are..." or "the majority of elders are..." I think I tend to do that too, but, having been an elder myself, I probably project my own thoughts and feelings on what "most elders" are like.
I was born into this nutty, three-ring circus and believed it was the Truth. For a time I resisted becoming a servant, but eventually accepted appointment. I served as an MS for three years and an elder for three before stepping aside. While I now recognize that the WTS is not what it claims to be, I can positively assure you that I used to believe it wholeheartedly.
Did feelings of "power" enter into it? I don't think so for me. I can admit I used to enjoy giving talks--and I did like it when others expressed how much they liked my talks. But it's no different from similar expressions made here in appreciation of contributions to this forum. And I took very seriously the notion that I was somehow being used by God, and tried my best to carry things off as lovingly as possible where "the friends" were concerned.
I know when some others here remember elders, they remember those who were puffy and haughty--and tend to suggest these were in the majority. Maybe they were, but to me it seems like most of them....were just guys. "Most" of them never had any idea of being an elder earlier in life, DID NOT like getting up on the stage to give talks, and would rather leave the job of "shepherding" the congregation to someone else. But so many of them were guilted into it.
"We need more capable brothers to reach out," was the constant call where I came from. I remember one guy who was absolutely paralyzed with fear every time he got up to give a part on stage. Very soft spoken and jittery. I guess he's been an elder for thirty years now.
Then there was another very mild-mannered, quiet, Hispanic man who felt inadequately educated to be telling anyone else anything. Another brother who (I'm sure to the rest of the body's chagrin) used to say to everyone in the congregation (even from the stage) he'd rather not be an elder. He didn't think he was good enough, and thought others could do better--but he was asked and asked and asked again--so he agreed.
Bottom line: do "most" of these guys really believe it's the Truth? My answer is "yes," I think they do. Whatever "power" some of them enjoy is (in my opinion) most of the time not the primary motivation--but maybe just a fringe benefit. They figure: This is the Truth; I guess I'd rather be in a "power" position than otherwise.
I know the power you describe is no doubt important to a certain percentage of those who are appointed elders. The fact is it's only conjecture to express whether that percentage is "the majority" or not. Just as elders should never be in the position to judge a person repentant or not--we can't always be certain of what resides in the hearts of others.
But if this forum is any indication, there are a growing number of elders who DON'T really believe it's the Truth, and some of them are trying to find a way out. I salute all of you. I did it, and so can you.
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greendawn
Basically I agree with Confession from what I had seen of JW elders in the ex congo and the neighbouring ones, some were enjoying the importance, the power trip, of having a rank in the JW society but some were genuine and humble, but I think most believed the WTS was God's only chosen organisation on earth.
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tijkmo
i know it wasnt about power for me..
i know several that it is about the power..
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delilah
Do you honestly believe all the elders stay because of faith? I don't.
Free2be.................I know of one elder in particular, who told me, to my face, that if he could not be an elder, there was no reason for him to be at the kingdom hall.
I kid you not!!!
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blondie
Elders tend to fall into 3 categories
The "power-mad" ones (tend to be in control)
The ones who allow them to be that way afraid of losing their position (for the sake of peace and unity on the body)
The ones who try to counter-balance the power-mad ones (but get worn down and eventually leave)
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XBEHERE
The ones who allow them to be that way afraid of losing their position (for the sake of peace and unity on the body)
The ones who try to counter-balance the power-mad ones (but get worn down and eventually leave)
I fall somewhere between these 2 categories, never was about the power for me. I despise the ones in category 1 above in Blondies post. After reading Crisis of Conscience and now half way through In Search of Christian Freedom I see now that its a top down effect... the bodies of elders are behaving like min- GB's. I bet these GB memebers seldom if ever go on shepherding calls themselves, hypocrites!
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roybatty
and to make matters worse, most amount to little or nothing in the non-JW world. So the KH becomes their little kingdom where they get off on "proving" that they are someone important.
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LovesDubs
When I first came into the world of the JWs at 29 I met such an array of elder personalities it was hard to figure out what their criteria were for being elected at all. I think it came down to "male" and "over 18" in some cases because like most halls, there was a definite lack of men and a plethora of women. The women did all the cleaning, bible studies, talks and pioneering and the men well....lorded it over the women and "supervised" all the aforementioned activities. Oh....and they curled up the microphone cords after every meeting which is very very important Godly work.
At first blush my initial contact with the JWs was very controversial as they had some "apostate's" brother slathering all the cars in the parking lot with transcripts of secretly recorded elders meetings and phone calls, and tapes that they were distributing protesting the DFing of the now-labeled apostate. I didnt know what this thing was on my visor so I put it into the tape player in my car and listened to it on the way home. Read the transcript and thought...what the hell IS this group Im getting involved with??? Then at the Sunday meeting, (my third only) I brought the tape and the transcript in and asked an elder about it and he said "YOU DIDNT LISTEN TO THIS DID YOU???" and he took the tape, grabbed the tape itself and very dramatically started pulling the tape out of the cartridge in the middle of the hall and yelling "Apostates! Evil slave!! Never EVER listen to their blasphemy against Jehovah again!!" Freaked my sh__ OUT!!
But instead of running as I SHOULD HAVE...I thought, wow these guys are really serious about this stuff...this must BE the truth! And I stayed. Damn.