Life sucks, then you die, causing life to suck for others.

serendipity

A male relative died last week after a short illness. I don't know what will appear in his obituary but I doubt it will capture his personality and what the loss means.

His adult children will miss the comforting, steadfast presence of their father. His friends will miss his company, his laughter and stories. His acquaintances in town will note the passing of another oldtimer who craftily survived horrific times when so many young men didn't, and managed to live life fully, graciously and responsibly in subsequent years, when many survivors couldn't.

I wasn't close to him, but feel sadder with each passing day because of lost stories, lost opportunities of a generational connection, lost bits of heritage. How long before his stories are lost forever? Or my mother's? Or mine?

Satanus

:( Getting up my nerve... (serendipity)

S

outoftheorg

You sure got that right, Serendipity.

I lost my wife July the 11th.

Been sort of wandering around "mentally" and lots of tears.

If your grief is strong enough to cause you to cry, don't stuff it, let it out.

Got that from the counselor I am seeing. I am told that this too will pass.

I hope they are correct.

Outoftheorg

anewme

Im so sorry OUtoftheorg for your terrible loss. I had no idea. Have you shared your loss on JWD and I missed it? Wish we were all neighbors so we could comfort each other in a real way. Loving community is sooo sweet! I hope you have someone to comfort you at this time. Friends help us to heal. Good you have a counselor.
And Serendipity, you have touched on a subject no fun to talk about.....the reality of life and death and its terrible consequences. We have so many happy experiences in life but the bad experiences like loss of a loved one seem to overshadow an otherwise happy life.

Ive read alot of stories of human life and tragedy and if one lives long enough, the heart gets broken by a loved ones death. It is credit to the human mind and heart that so many rise above the incredible sadness of it all and somehow smile again. But for a time the world seems an empty place and the darkness seems to dominate.

Thankyou for your post as I often entertain the darkness and sadness of life in my thoughts and heart.
I keep it like some sacred knowlege hidden away that I balance all day to day occurrences against.
Knowing this truth about life and loss helps to keep everything in better perspective.
I enjoy small joys much more and laugh harder and heartier than alot do. I also am layed back and take small crisis better than I would otherwise.

If you intend to live a long life you must prepare your heart to accept loss and grief, knowing "this too will pass"

Anewme

purplesofa

Seems so many are dealing with deaths right now.

(((((((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))))))))

to all and myself.

purps

outoftheorg

Thanks to you all for your replies to my post. I have gone through some very difficult times in my life and I have to say that this loss of Donna is by far more disturbing in many other areas of life than anything I have lived through.

I didn't lose my wife and now find myself single. I lost my best friend, my companion, my lover, all the trips we planned after she retired, my counselor, my artistic friend, my source of friendship and love and caring and humor and good sense and a thousand little things we seldom see until we lose them.

Up to the very last she still was concerned about MY well being and wanting to do and buy things for me.

We only had 8 y'rs together but they were the best 8 y'rs of my life.

Thanks again to you all.

Outoftheorg

serendipity

Thanks Satanus, OOTO, anewme & purps.

DesertRat

My heart goes out to those of you here who have lost loved ones recently. The next anniversary of my father's death is less than a month away, & I am dreading it...

A good counselor once told me that as long as I was able to think about someone I missed (once the worst of the pain was gone..), or remember some of the little things they had done during their life, it meant that he or she wasn't completely gone. That thought has sustained me through some very difficult moments. Seemingly trivial things such as my father's stamp albums, his method of preparing French toast (which nobody else has ever duplicated), or the way he said 'adVURTissment' instead of 'adverTISEment'--have much more meaning to me now.

(((((((Serendipity)))))))

(((((((Outoftheorg)))))))

DR

What-A-Coincidence

going out as a fam. does not suck as much. i would rather go out like that, they don't suffer, i don't suffer, all is good.

Life sucks, then you die, causing life to suck for others.

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