How do you keep your mind on the positives not the negatives?

by Mysterious 4 Replies latest jw friends

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  Mysterious

  I thought this thread would be good for those leaving the organization since there are many ups and downs. Sometimes I think we dwell more on the negative than the positive and that leads to people going back because the bad seems to outweigh the good.

  * Make a pro and con list
  * Try to think of how each negative has a positive side to it and what the could be
  * Actively list all the good things that have come into your life every day
  * Go do something that gives you enjoyment when you are dwelling too much on the negatives
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  sass_my_frass

  As I write, my neighbour is playing a Foo Fighter album for the eighth time today. Now I do like FF, but I'm wishing that he'd change the album.

  Your idea sounds like a great thing to do. I get down about one or two days a month, and on those days I write and write. It was happening at work, so I made it a spreadsheet, which for a sort-o-phile like me is a boon. I write down the ugly thought, then tab over and write an 'upside' to it. The file has a hundred ugly thoughts, but every one of them has a solution. Some of the solutions aren't ideal but a Thing that I must Accept. I started a few months ago and was hell-for-leather on it until recently when I discovered that I'd just about said it all, which was so great to know; it is fantastic to know that there is a finite amount of reasons to be unhappy, and that each of them has another perspective, a lesson, and a conclusions sooner or later. It's going to take time, but in the meantime there is a great life to be had out there, and I'm having that too.
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  JWdaughter

  Fear-of one thing or another. That the WT may have something critical right.That they will be abandoned by loved ones that are JW. That they will no longer have a job. That they will no longer have any friends. That they will no longer feel superior. That they will no longer feel self righteous. shelly
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  VM44

  At any one time I make sure that I think of an even multiple of negatives so that I can keep my positive outlook. --VM44
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  Mysterious

  Hmm music there is another one I forgot to add to my list.