How 'diverse' is your life now?

by AK - Jeff 9 Replies latest jw friends

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  AK - Jeff

  What have you done with your life, what friends have you made, what goals have you pursued, that were impossible to do as a witness?

  I know that in our case, we have few friends yet, due to spending most of the past few years 'healing' from the borg-torture. But the ones we have are so different in every way to those we had in the 'truth'. I discuss politics and religion freely with many of them. We have had several 'gay' persons in our lives now - and we embrace them with great affection. Holidays, etc are part of our lives now.

  For the most part we look to be 'Reformed Witnesses' I suppose - but our lives are richer now than before - and we value and love all people regardless of nationality, race, sexual orientation, facial hair, wear pant-suits, drive two door cars, ect.

  Jeff
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  acadian

  Lot's of friends! It's funny in the org when I would ask for help on something I always seemed to get excuses why they couldn't help. My new "Worldly" friends go out of their way in most cases, which is a sad commentary on the dub's Acadian
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  mama1119

  I am closer to my extended family now that we don't have the borg barrier. I also love holidays and birthdays and am able to celebrate them with family that I used to not have much to do with.
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  fullofdoubtnow

  I've made several new friends since I left, but the big thing has been moving in with my boyfriend. I certainly wouldn't have done that in the org, not for long anyway.
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  Nowman

  I feel my group of friends are the best friends I have ever had. They allow me to be me. I have a rebellious nature, I enjoy breaking some of the "rules". I think I have always been free spirited, but had to hold back in the org. When I left, I felt this was my best quality, and it was so wonderful to let my free spiritedness out, I did not have to hide it anymore.

  I have an awesome "worldly" husband . I have two great kids that do not have to be raised in that org. Everything I do in my life since being out of the org, always feels like a change or step...I like it.

  I could go on and on.

  Nikki
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  greendawn

  Good social life, open mind, a lot of culture and intellectual activity that the JW environment does not have.
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  cyd0099

  I was just talking about this last weekend.
  I have friends who are considered a bit off the traditional path;
  Artists, cartoonists, gay, straight, singers, actors, poly, monogamous, pierced, tattooed, religious and/or not, writers, t-shirt designers... A whole world of different but wonderful people.
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  LittleToe

  I've been able to get an education, pursue a career, visit any religious establishment I desire, take up a martial art, motorcycle and scuba dive to my hearts content, sleep in on weekends, listen to live Rock music, light up a cigarette or pipe, read "questionable material", travel extensively, grow a beard at will, associate with whom I wish...

  ...all without having a bunch of folks look down their noses at me for not "putting Kingdom Interests first".
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  Satans little helper

  I now think for myself, I can now make friends with people that I like, rather than people with whom I share the same mental illness, I have persued an education, gained a great career, met a wonderful woman, lost a controlling and abusive father and generally found myself.
  
  It's taken me a long time to get there, I was disfellowshipped when I was 18 in 1990 and would say that it took me over 10 years to really find myself. I am not sure whether that was because I missed out on a proper upbringing and was 18 when I left, or whether it is a reflection on me and my personality. I will say that it has taken a long time to work out how to really deal with people and make real friends.
  
  I have made alot of friends through forums such as this one, in fact I met one of my closest friends through this place. I think it is the most frightening and difficult thing we face when we free ourselves, to find friends and people to surround ourselves with. Being a JW isolates you from people in such a way that you have very little common ground with which to start friendships and little in the way of terms of reference for what a real friendship is, without the relationship being conditional.
  
  Steve
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  achickwwit

  I'm 29 and just completed my Bachelor's degree and am considering going for my Master's starting in fall! Education was always so important to me, but it was squelched as a Witness.

  Even better: I married a wonderful man who was raised a Born Again Christian with many of the same restrictions (holidays, etc.) as Witnesses. I would have never met him had I not left. :-)