by My MILs worst nightmare, a nonJW 9 Replies latest jw friends
I used the word retard a while back and was PM'ed by a mother explaining how hurtful the word was. I will never use that word again.
Below is a little long but incredibly inspiring story about a father and his son. Please take the time to watch the video at the end.
Warning: grab some tissues
A big man knows how to apologize right. I KNEW there was a reason I liked you, MIL's Nightmare.
My new friends child...
That video is so powerful. I love you for understanding. The "R" word is a word that people feel free to use and dismiss it as if it shouldn't matter. It's no different then any other negative word that people don't use anymore (at least in public) and yet I am made to feel as if I should just accept it and it's "no big deal" or "I am not referring to your daughter".
It hits me as hard as the "N" or any other racial or bias slur hits others and there are over 500,000 parents and advocates in the US alone that feel the same way.
She is beautiful and amazing and it is her that people are talking about when they use the word as a hateful slur or a way to describe an elder they don't like. I get that it means to slow or to stop growth. That is a correct usage and you and I had that conversation. Using it as a noun...just not acceptable. It IS talking about my child when it is used. It IS talking about an entire group of people that cannot defend themselves when it is used. She didn't ask for this and God knows she doesn't deserve what she is going thru health wise right now.
You have been more then kind to me the last few weeks. I want everyone here to know that. You got it. You understood my pain without becoming defensive and without it becoming an argument. I love you more then you know and you have me in tears with your compassion, understanding and love.
What a cutie!
I would get so mad when my children used "that word". I used to tell them they were one car accident away from being in the same condition. I think people abuse those who they fear most, because it IS a dreaded fear to lose one's mind. It could happen to any one of us.
...and that dad, amazing! We tend to think fathers and heroes like that are one in a million, but we all start out the same way. That dad STARTED by jogging a few blocks, the same as any one of us would. He's no stronger or smarter or more noble. He just stuck to it, that's all. I think it helped that he never forgot the thrill of his son's joy. Rich, rich, rich I tell you. Those men have got it going on.
When I watched this it reminded me that when I get tired as a parent, to keep moving forward, and keep my children in the forefront. They are not heavy and we should be doing everything we possibly can to support them through life.
Its just too damn bad that as a child of a Jehovahs Witnesses, I never felt this kind of support or dedication. The attitude was, what have you done for us lately, and what you have done is not enough, and beware we can throw you away on a moments notice.
r.
What a fantastic story of love, courage and endurance!! Thanks for posting the link MIL.
And the pic - what a sweetie - I'd watch out for those teeth there, I reckon they could do some serious damage lol!!
The "R" word has thankfully been out of order for a long time here in the UK - along with "spastic". It makes me shudder when I see it in posts on here but still seems to be relatively acceptable in America - hopefully not for much longer eh?
peace
The "R" word has thankfully been out of order for a long time here in the UK
Having worked in the 'social services' sector in Canada, the word was eliminated a very long time ago from our agencies. sammieswife.
Our agencies and doctors NEVER use the term. Delay is the word we hear. I hear it as slang by teenagers and read it on this board as a noun to describe people. I brought it to one members attention that it is a hateful word and shouldn't be used and I only received a hateful retort and defensiveness. People can get that way when they are called on their bad behavior. I digress...it's not my job to change the world but if I can make a difference to just one person then that is progress.
Those teeth are lethal! HA! I quit nursing about a month ago. She is kickin my ass on the health front but we are working on that! Kiss your babies and hold them tight no matter how old. She deserves so much more but we are playing the cards as they are delt.
Peace
I brought it to one members attention that it is a hateful word and shouldn't be used and I only received a hateful retort and defensiveness. People can get that way when they are called on their bad behavior.
You know Iforget, if this person despite that reaction to your plea, refrained from ever using that term again, then you ultimately succeeded in your goal.
