the elders made me do it

by BlackSwan of Memphis 7 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  BlackSwan of Memphis

  Ok, I was inspired by Bstndance (sp?).

  When my mom came up to the hospital to see Hannah she had told me that Before she Decided to come, she called Bro so and so, an elder. The way I took it was to make sure it was ok. To get some good healthy counsel.

  It made me laugh later. Because I thought about how often people will run to the elders (I am just as guilty of it as them) rather then just think to themselves:

  This feels really wrong to shun this person that I love. Perhaps that means it Is wrong.

  But, as I'm sure others have figured, if they can blame it on the elders then they don't have to carry the burden, because the burden is so truly hard to carry (well I would hope so anyway). And their own guilty conscience convicts them.

  What do you think? Am I thinking of this right?
• 

  Bstndance

  Totally. And thanks for the "shout out". Society as a whole like to always play the victim. Therefore it absolves the individual of responsibility.
• 

  PrimateDave

  I think you're right. It is kind of human nature to pass the blame and/or try to not take responsibility for one's own actions. At least, that is, it is part of the dark side of human nature. Naturally, the Organization seems to encourage this sort of behavior in the flock, what with discouraging independent thinking. So much for that "Bible Trained Conscience" they keep talking about. Don't want to feel guilty communicating with an 'apostate' son or daughter? Get permission from the elders for extenuating circumstances! Of course, they don't see it that way, now do they? Just some thoughts.
  
  Dave
• 

  BlackSwan of Memphis

  Totally. And thanks for the "shout out". Society as a whole like to always play the victim. Therefore it absolves the individual of responsibility.

  No problem! I really identified with your thread. It just makes me scratch my head and say, ok, fine, Blame it on the elders, but you are the one turning over your powers of decision making, so therefore, you are still to blame.

  I think you're right. It is kind of human nature to pass the blame and/or try to not take responsibility for one's own actions. At least, that is, it is part of the dark side of human nature. Naturally, the Organization seems to encourage this sort of behavior in the flock, what with discouraging independent thinking. So much for that "Bible Trained Conscience" they keep talking about. Don't want to feel guilty communicating with an 'apostate' son or daughter? Get permission from the elders for extenuating circumstances! Of course, they don't see it that way, now do they? Just some thoughts.

  And some good thoughts they are! You are right in that it is part of human nature. That's life. When my husband ran into my brother a couple of months back, my hubby asked him: Does this feel right? Does this all feel right? Guess what he said. No. <<slaps head>> Uhm, hello? Makes me wonder if while it Is passing off the responsibility to someone else, perhaps it is fear of one's self?
• 

  crazyblondeb

  My mom still goes to the elders and askes if she can come and eat with us at family get-togethers!!

  And she listens to them, when it suits her!!
• 

  jaguarbass

  The witnesses are taught not to be responsible for their thinking or their actions. The brothers in Brooklyn handle all of that. Until you screw your life up, then its your fault.
• 

  TheHypnoToad

  In my opinion (who else's would it be), people in general like to be told what to do if there is a chance that they can do it wrong. BUT there are those who do what they want and deal with the consequences of their actions, JW's are taught to do what their told and not make their own decisions from infancy.
  
  I think it is amazing that some of us raised as a JW's, ever have the ability to have their OWN opinions.
  
  TheHypnoToad don't sign his post!
• 

  BlackSwan of Memphis

  My mom still goes to the elders and askes if she can come and eat with us at family get-togethers!!

  And she listens to them, when it suits her!!

  Oh yeah, I can identify with that. I was thinking today, I wonder if my mom asked the elders if it would be ok to give me that tract? I wonder if they ask before they have too much to drink? Wow, that list could go on and on.

  The witnesses are taught not to be responsible for their thinking or their actions. The brothers in Brooklyn handle all of that. Until you screw your life up, then its your fault.

  That would be true. Too, consider what is their version of screwing up your life compared to the rest of the worlds? Having a career? A college degree from a Univ? A happy balanced relationship with the person you love? etc

  In my opinion (who else's would it be), people in general like to be told what to do if there is a chance that they can do it wrong. BUT there are those who do what they want and deal with the consequences of their actions, JW's are taught to do what their told and not make their own decisions from infancy.
  
  I think it is amazing that some of us raised as a JW's, ever have the ability to have their OWN opinions.

  
  I honestly think that a good chunk of those people do have an opinion, they do think independently, they just keep their mouths shut because they know the consequences.