Hello Zack and welcome to the forum, No you are not responsible for all that has happened in the last 6000 years and many of the things happen to us and our weakness we are not responsible. I don't know your witness back ground and you sound a bit frustrated with the way things are and your own failings or weakness, Well GET IN LINE.
I dont see the God of the Bible as the witness see Him, I see someone who as Paul put it in Romans 11:33-35 33 O the depth of God’s riches and wisdom and knowledge! How unsearchable his judgments [are] and past tracing out his ways [are]! 34 For “who has come to know Jehovah’s mind, or who has become his counselor?” 35 Or, “Who has first given to him, so that it must be repaid to him?”
I don't think we can put our finger on it and say this is exactly the way it is going to happen and I know all things, This is God we are talking about and he is not required to give out every detail to us anymore than a parent in their own home has to explain every detail in their home to their children With our little minds we couldnt handle it anyway. But I see the God of the Bible as a loving person who knows what we are up against, that is why he gave His Son, who is the most under rated person the Witness know. I encourage you to get a Bible or several (you can do this online through Biblegateway.com) and read the Bible and ask Jehovah to open your mind and heart to see the wonderful hope that we have in Christ who is the central figure of all of God's promises.
Everything revolves around the promises of the Christ and there is forgiveness of sins and there is a God of mercy, not one like the Witness describe a God who cannot be satisfied. Turn to the Bible and ask God to help you see the truth as ONLY found in the scriptures not man made worship. I wish you the best and turn to God not men.
abr
