More Christian Humor

by moomanchu 5 Replies latest social humour

  • moomanchu
    moomanchu

    STORY OF ELIJAH

    The Sunday school teacher was carefully explaining the story of Elijah the Prophet and the false prophets of Baal. She explained how Elijah built the altar, put wood upon it, cut the steer in pieces, and laid it upon the altar. Then, Elijah commanded the people of God to fill four barrels of water and pour it over the altar. He had them do this four times. "Now, said the teacher, "can anyone in the class tell me why the Lord would have Elijah pour water over the steer on the altar?" A little girl in the back of the room started waving her hand, "I know! I know!" she said, "To make the gravy!"
    LOT'S WIFE

    The Sunday School teacher was describing how Lot's wife looked back and turned into a pillar of salt, when little Jason interrupted, "My Mummy looked back once, while she was driving," he announced triumphantly, "and she turned into a telephone pole!"


    DID NOAH FISH? 

    A Sunday school teacher asked, "Johnny, do you think Noah did a lot of fishing when he was on the Ark?" "No," replied David. "How could he, with just two worms?"


    HIGHER POWER

    A Sunday school teacher said to her children, " We have been learning how powerful kings and queens were in Bible times. But, there is a higher power. Can anybody tell me what it is?" One child blurted out, "Aces!"


    MOSES &THE RED SEA

    Nine-year-old Joey, was asked by his mother what he had learned in Sunday school. "Well, Mom, our teacher told us how God sent Moses behind enemy lines on a rescue mission to lead the Israelites out of Egypt . When he got to the Red Sea, he had his army build a pontoon bridge and all the people walked across safely Then, he radioed headquarters for reinforcements. They sent bombers to blow up the bridge and all the Israelites were saved". "Now, Joey, is that really what your teacher taught you?" his mother asked. "Well, no, Mom, but, if I told it the way the teacher did, you'd never believe it!"

  • lovelylil
    lovelylil

    ha,ha, those were cute. Lilly

  • xjwms
    xjwms

    another cute one.

    .

  • gumb
    gumb

    "When I was a babe, I used to speak as a babe, to think as a babe, to reason as a babe; but now that I have become a [mature] woman, I have done away with the traits of a babe" (1 Corinthians 13:11 - The New Woman's Translation of the Holy Scriptures).

  • badboy
    badboy

    VERY GOOD!

  • gumb
    gumb

    "After these things I heard what was a loud voice of a great crow in heaven" (Revelation 19:1 - The New Bird's Translation of the Holy Scriptures)

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