Question for Former/Current Elders.....

Lumptard

I recently received a phone call from an Elder about an alegation that one of my ex-girlfriends brought up to the elders in her cong (the thing that she told the elders about was supposed to have happened 5 years ago when we were still together). He told me what she had said about me and I said "o.k." in order to not confirm or deny that it was true. I asked him if he was accusing me of this sin and he said "once someone brings up something like this, then it becomes an accusation."

I was under the impression that in order to accuse someone of a sin, that an Elder must speak with you in the company of at least another brother. Is a phone call like this supposed to even happen? Is it likely that if i go back to the hall (long shot) that they can confront me about these alegations?

skyking

People are their own worse enemy tell them there is no truth to the report. It does not matter if it is true or not. They need two witnesses sense they were asking you about it means they do not have the second witness, If they did have the second witness you would have been ask to go to a meeting. Then you would have been told what the accusation against you was and that you need to attained this meeting.

The other way it could have went down, two Elders come by and you informed you, you needed to attend a Judicial meeting also you would of been informed what the accusation was.

Since you have not been asked to go to a meeting shows they have nothing on you. Don't give them anything.

Finally-Free

If this person is accusing you and cannot prove it then, according to watchtower rules, it is slander.

W

Confession

I was under the impression that in order to accuse someone of a sin, that an Elder must speak with you in the company of at least another brother. Is a phone call like this supposed to even happen? Is it likely that if i go back to the hall (long shot) that they can confront me about these alegations?

When conducting an official investigation, there are supposed to be at least two elders. A judicial committee is supposed to be at least three. But this doesn't mean an elder can't call you if he wants to. Of course if his goal is to get a confession, it's a little dumb to call you alone. Then no one can confirm what he hears. It is possible that someone else was listening on the other line; such things have happened before.

MeneMene

If you confessed to him and later denied confessing where would they be?

Be careful with what you say on the phone calls, he may have another elder/witness listening in on the phone call in case you later recanted.

Someone here mentioned a week or so ago that they had a second person listening in on a phone call to him/her.

Edited to add: Confession you were reading my mind.

truthsetsonefree

Its an accusation. They can and will confront you with it. But.....if you don't meet with them or deny it then they must get a second witness. Sometimes they will have the accuser confront you in a judicial investigation but thats rare. Even then if you refuse to meet or deny the charge there is little that the elders can do.

tsof

AllTimeJeff

As the others have pointed out, some elders use speaker phone or record phone calls. I have been a part of both.So don't confirm anything on the phone, esp....

They can't DF you if you don't meet with them. My suggestion would be for you to tell them that you see no need to address this, that you have no further comment on it, and make it clear (should they continue to pursue you) that you are not yet in a place where you feel comfortable meeting with them. Repeat as necesarry until they leave you alone.