by RULES & REGULATIONS 6 Replies latest jw friends
I've been inactive for 5 years now.I was taken off the Ministry School, no hours in service, don't comment at the Watchtower Study and only attend 1 meeting per week.The Elders try to see if I want to study with someone and I refuse.
Have the Elders marked me without telling me? Do they want to bother with members like me? Do they wish I would go away? What is their next step? Will they wait until I make a false step and pounce on me without any mercy? Am I even in their radar?
I really think this will depend on your elder body. Some won't care. Some will be looking for ways to get rid of you.
You might want to be careful (assuming you just want to fade and not be DA'd) about some of the probing questions that elders may ask you. At the last elder's shool I attended some years ago (I've faded away a little over 2 years now), they had us write down several questions that we should ask inactive ones. One was, "Do you still consider yourself one of Jehovah's Witnesses?" We were told that if the person said "yes" then offer a Bible study and a pickup for meetings, but if they said "no" it would be grounds to make an anouncement that such-and-such "is no longer one of Jehovah's Witnesses."
There is usually an effort around this time of year to touch base with the inactive ones and attempt to "reactivate". In my hall, there was a list that the secretary complied of all the folks that were inactive in the congregation. The WTS instructs BOEs to assign all persons with an inactive status to a bookstudy group. Usually, the book study "overseer" will be the one assigned to contact the inactive person. Since you've been inactive for about 5 years, they likely will offer you a study. If you say no thanks and keep it short, usually they won't push it.
Usually inactive and faders are pretty easy to deal with from a BOE prospective. Out of sight, out of mind.
Not saying this is a Christian thing to do (just the opposite actually) but I believe this to be the reality in many cases.
R&R, you are probably off the radar until next year.
They may see your non participation in meetings and refusal to study as a sign you don't really want to be a jw, and ask you a few questions about how you feel about the wts and it's teachings, or they might just leave you alone. It all depends on them, really.
When I attended group meetings and sales rallies the Witness people hassled me by criticizing my wardrobe, my car, and my family. The Witnesses bullied me (or tried), for example, by belly pushing me and my 3 year old son away from a vending machine at a sales rally. After I quit attending Watch Tower Corporation sponsored events I didn't hear from any Witnesses in an official capacity for 9 years.
At the 9 year meeting, I gave the Batman and Robin team 10 questions and they couldn't answer even one. I waited 9 more years and they had not contacted me up until that time.
At the point I had been away from the group 18 years (1992) I made the mistake of thinking my brother was my friend ( a mistake I will not make again) and I told him some of my feelings about the bad Witness information they had delivered to us and some discouraging behaviors of a few of the Witness people we both knew, and he ratted me out to the elders and the shunning started at that time.
I believe the elders I have known found this walkaway extremely hard for them to process. I refused to "deal" with them. I don't deal with snakes.
I started fading in 1998. Meeting attendance was sporadic. In 2000 I had a guilt trip after reading COC in 1999. Tried going back and even knocked on a few doors. It was one of the most gut wrenching things I have done. It just wasn't in me anymore. I up and quit.........but it took awhile for the guilt to subside. My last meeting was Memorial 2003.
I've never looked back. I feel no guilt. I'm very happy as a Christian who is a church goer today.
The elders tried to contact me several times by phone and coming to my home. But they did not try very hard. I don't really think the majority of those men give a damn until the CO visits and orders them to check up on inactive ones. And that has been quite awhile for me.
I will not answer the phone if there is not a name and number on the caller ID and I definitely will not answer if I see it is one of them. And I would not answer the door if they came. You can't talk to brainwashed idiots. Except for the guy I brought in back in 1977. He hasn't called here for several years, but if he does, I will be more than happy to talk to him. I will certainly apologise for bringing him into a life of hell. What a story he would tell if he became one of us. Poor guy! He sure was duped.......and screwed over big time.......and I bear some of the responsibility of it!
However.........in the life I am in today........I will make my position known to any JW I used to associate with. I will give them a witness for Jesus now. Only problem is.......I never see anyone. They don't even disturb my neighborhood anymore on Saturday or any other day. The last time I even talked to one of them was in 2003.
Go figure!
HappyDad
