My letter to Danny should sum it up. I'll follow this post with a group photo.
Hi Danny,
What a memorable chat we had on the phone last night. Surprisingly, I slept great right after. I was a bit embarrassed talking to you since wife Judy tells me I sound horrible, like talking through a canyon thanks to my bad allergy for the past few days.
As mentioned, I caught your name in the body of some Oregon’s newspaper article of 2002. The reporter quoted you as some ex-elder, now an activist and having met your current wife this way. The report had you leaving the Witnesses in 1984 and sharing custody of your two children. My heart went out to you.
I found this article immersed in a posting on an online forum that I frequent, Jehovahs-Witness.com, or JWD for short. If you ever get a computer, Danny, I suggest you and Rosie do some lurking here where many of us feel like family although most of us have never met. We can always use another helpful voice.
I am so happy for you. Both your children from years ago are out of the WT, and Rxxxx’s out. It occurred to me, as we talked, that it was as if we’re family. It’s like we’ve all been through the fire together.
It’s a feeling similar to what I used to have when we’d visit different Kingdom Halls years ago, shaking hands with someone I’d never met. I viewed them as family, thinking that there was a special camaraderie. I didn’t realize, of course, how conditional that all was.
I am confident this is different as we no longer are defined by cultish boundaries.
When I called you I had just got off the phone with son Mxxxxxx (the non JW) who lives in Harriman, TN. I’d told him about the newspaper clipping with your name and we talked about the many fond memories we had of you. I remember the time when the 8 of us crammed into our Ford station wagon and weaved our way through those hills to War Eagle, home of that now world famous arts and crafts fair. Do you remember that October day? Raining. Cold. Muddy. All the while, trying to keep Jon’s behavior down to a dull roar.
Michael remembers you taking him and his brothers to see Charlotte’s Web. Interesting to me since that movie actually debuted in 1973, which means that we were still in Rogers and, obviously, you hadn’t left as well. Impressive, to me, that a young man in his 20’s would be generous enough with his time to share with my four rowdies. The enclosed photo should show all of us at one time or another. Some grandchildren are mixed in for good measure.
Yes, I remember many folks from Rogers, AR, and remember many good times there. I well remember the various Wilson clans, the Field’s, the Payne’s, the Rae’s, Umbargers, Barnes, Enderlins, Kaisers, Overholsers, Ash’s and more. Perhaps the enclosed composite photo I took at the Rae’s house get-together will help. I’m guessing 1969.
We had moved to Rogers in 1967. At that time I was not very active in FS, having had a depression episode over recent publication articles that exploited the "just around the corner" thinking. I never really came out of that funk during the 7 years we were in Rogers. That’s where my memory is obviously jaded as I do recall going to nearby congregations -- Fayetteville, Jay, Springdale -- to deliver public talks. There must’ve been some cognitive dissonance taking place. Otherwise, I was happy -- had a job I enjoyed, golfed occasionally, took up tennis, toted the boys on various outings in the beautiful NW Arkansas area, taking many photos in the process.
We moved back in the mid 70’s to Marshalltown, Iowa, because of Mxxxxxx. That was her home and I had taken her away from her mother. You may not recall her mother’s visits to Rogers that extended to two months, or so. I didn’t mind. She was a pleasant person.
It was when those visits were in reverse, Mxxxxxx and the boys going off to Iowa for a month or two -- was when I realized it was a losing battle to stay in a place I loved.
For some reason I was able to shove many of those earlier doubts into some deeper crevice in my brain after our move north. I was appointed elder shortly after the move and became friends (tennis was our bond) with Jim Finders (your age, Danny), who was also appointed at the same time. That raised a few eyebrows in Marshalltown -- I mean, Jim’s young age of some 25.
I’m going to now play lazy, Danny. For the rest of my story, I’ll simply print out one of my online documents, "They’re Your Kids Too!" Referenced within that, my online essay, "Dear Mother", which highlight’s specific acts of dishonesty by the writers and publishers of Watchtower.
Don’t forget, Danny -- you and Rosie and clan have a standing invitation in our home. Judy always seems to have a pot of beans and a batch of cornbread hot and ready.
Sincerely, Len
