JW email making the rounds - feeling guilt for not doing enough in service

by truthseeker 9 Replies latest jw friends

  • truthseeker
    truthseeker

    This is making the rounds...

    The third danger that also involves feelings of guilt, not for doing what's wrong, but for not doing enough in our service to Jehovah God. It's natural that all of us want to serve Jehovah as fully as possible in the ministry but some feel very guilty because they're not able to do more.

    Maybe because of certain circumstances, age, health, family restrictions, they just feel guilty that they can't do more and that guilt can be dangerous as well. Notice these expressions of some of our brothers and sisters that found themselves in that circumstance. One says, "Do you know how time consuming poverty is," wrote a sister who with her husband are raising three children, "I must conserve wherever I can. This means spending time searching through thrift shops, clearance racks, or even sewing clothes. I spend an hour or two each week working on discount food coupons. At times I feel very guilty doing these things, thinking that I should be spending that time out in the field service."

    Another sister with four children and an unbelieving husband said, "I thought I must not really love Jehovah enough. So I struggled with my serving him. I tried very hard but I never felt that it was enough. You see, I didn't have any feelings of self-worth so I could not imagine how Jehovah could ever accept my service to him."

    And finally, a Christian who found it necessary to leave the full-time service said, "I couldn't stand the idea that I was failing in my commitment to serve Jehovah full-time. You can't imagine how disappointed I was. I cry now remembering."

    So can we relate to any of those feelings, as well? The question is what does Jehovah expect of us? Do we have reason to feel guilty? Colossians 3:23 gives us very straight forward what Jehovah expects of us. Colossians 3:23, "Whatever you are doing, work at it whole-souled as to Jehovah, and not to men." So two important points there, what Jehovah expects, he expects whole-souled service, just to give our very best to him. Give whatever we possibly can in our life. And you notice, who are we doing it for? We're not doing it for other people we're doing it for Jehovah God. It doesn't matter what other people see it doesn't matter what other people say, it's how Jehovah feels about it. Jehovah requires no more than whole-souled service but he also requires no less than that, as well.

    The problem is there may be a big difference between what we would like to do and what we realistically can do. Again, we might be limited by one thing or another but why would we feel guilty about that if we're doing our very best under those circumstances? Why would we feel guilty? Well, there are several reasons for that. One could be that we have an unrealistic view of what Jehovah does expect. Somehow we set these high standards and say, "well if I can't reach those, than I'm bad, I'm not doing what's right." Some apply the little saying, you know, no pain no gain to serving Jehovah God. Well that might apply to weightlifting but that doesn't apply to serving Jehovah God. Jehovah does not expect us to hurt ourselves to serve him. Another reason that we might feel guilty is because we compare ourselves to others. Galatians 6:4 tells us point blank, "Do not compare yourself to others." See, Jehovah doesn't do it, we shouldn't.

    The third reason might be just feelings of worthlessness. Maybe based on an emotional problem, a mental situation, maybe it's depression, those kinds of things can cause us not ever to feel like we're worthy of Jehovah's help.

    And finally, sometimes it's what our brothers and sisters do, what they expect of us that causes us to feel guilty sometimes we even use guilt to motivate each other. For example, if somebody hasn't been at the meetings we might reason that if they feel guilty maybe they'll come. So when we see them we ask them, "Well, what's wrong?" "Don't you know if you're not at the meetings, you're going to lose out on paradise?" "You know so and so, are in worst condition than you and they're at the meetings." You might figure well maybe that will get them there and it might but they're not going to be happy doing it, though. Wouldn't it be better to show concern and caring, give them the benefit of the doubt? You know, "We missed you at the meetings. What can I do to help?" That's the way to approach it. Again, it's better to be at the meetings because they're happy rather than guilty.

    But how can we determine what we realistically can expect of ourselves? Maybe we're just blinding ourselves to what we can do? Maybe we've convinced ourselves we can't do anymore but we really can. How do we know? Talk it over with a mature Christian friend, someone in the congregation that knows your circumstances, your limitations, your responsibilities. Find out what they think. Maybe talk it over with a couple and then implement their suggestions, that if they say, "Oh you're doing more than I could in your circumstances." Well, feel good about it. Realize Jehovah probably feels the same way. If they suggest, "Well you know, here's a little area maybe you could do just a little bit more." Implement those suggestions. Remember, in Jehovah's eyes you're worth, as a person, is not measured by how much you do in the ministry. That was stated in our Watchtower as well. What you do in the preaching work may be more or less than what others do but as long as it represents your best Jehovah is more than pleased. All of his servants are precious to him that's why he drew you out of this old world.

  • M.J.
    M.J.

    Interesting email.

    That is a contrary message to the theme of one of the circuit assembly talks. This one talk centered on cutting out time-wasting daily activities to focus on what's most important--service.

  • White Dove
    White Dove

    They would be happier at the meetings? I never was and noticed that others weren't, either. The meetings drive home the point that no one is doing enough. They are repetitive guilt trips no one needs. Meetings are downers.

    "I haven't seen you at the meetings. What can I do to help?" Did you mean what can a person do to help the other to go to meetings? I think that is an attempt to treat the symptoms not the disease. Or, did you mean what can a person do to help the other with whatever the other needs? That is better. I never needed help to show up at meetings. I needed an understanding, compassionate ear without the guilt trips.

  • White Dove
    White Dove

    Ok, I just re-read your part of it and recognize the large part as written by someone else. I re-direct my comments to the WTS now.

  • M.J.
    M.J.
    Talk it over with a mature Christian friend, someone in the congregation that knows your circumstances, your limitations, your responsibilities. Find out what they think.

    The above point conflicts with the following point.

    We're not doing it for other peoplewe're doing it for Jehovah God. It doesn't matter what other people see it doesn't matter what other people say, it's how Jehovah feels about it.

    This piece of advice in practice can especially serve to shipwreck sticking to the above principle.

  • BFD
    BFD

    Holy crap! I couldn't even read the whole thing. These men are shameless!

    BFD

  • M.J.
    M.J.
    We're not doing it for other people we're doing it for Jehovah God.

    This thought is contrary to the requirement to turn in your time in order to remain "active".

    Greg Stafford wrote up an argument against this requirement in his "Three Dissertations..." book. I wonder if such a thought is beginning to make the rounds.

  • serendipity
    serendipity

    I remember the portion about poverty being time-consuming. This was either from a talk manuscript or written in one of the WT pubs.

  • sass_my_frass
    sass_my_frass

    It's a good one. The right language, the right amount of vague statements from sources that can't be confirmed, it could almost be an Awake article. At the very least, somebody will notice that it's the kindest thing they've heard in a while about kingdom service, and that it didn't come from the platform or a magazine.

  • TheListener
    TheListener

    I believe more emails of this type should be circulated. The dubs need to have someone in the organization who they view as spiritual tell them that it is ok to slack off.

    If enough of these types of emails go around the GB will get serious about banning jw related emails unless they are of a direct personal nature.

    imho

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