Once You Are Done, How Do Ex- Jehovahs Witnesses Relate To Each other?

The wanderer

Once You Are Done, How Do Ex- Jehovah’s Witnesses Relate To Each other?

My best friend in the organization and I had and still have a lot in common.
We are both college-educated designers, who enjoy the same movies,
music and creative thinking.

However, what if the only similarity two individuals in the organization had
in common was the religion, for example two pioneers.

The Religion As The Only Common Bond?

Suppose you are married or had a good friend in the organization and then
both of you came to the realization the Watchtower is a false religion what then?

As formerly, mentioned you have nothing in common outside the religion;
do you break off your friendship or divorce your mate?

What do you do?

Respectfully,

The Wanderer

carla

If they both left wouldn't that be the commonality then? As you see exjw's and those who's lives have been affected by the org have many issues to discuss!

WTWizard

Another thing two people who leave the Tower might have in common are the reasons why they left. It is very common for people in the Borg to discuss how they got the "truth": raised in it, a knock on the door, a tract, street work, a Witless employer or employee, etc. They might also discuss the things that they had to do in order to qualify to become a minister. One might have had to give up a romance; another, Christmas decorations; still another, smoking. And so on.

Once you are out, you might have similar common ground. You might discuss what crap you had to go through in the Tower. You might also have ground in what problem made you look to leave: it was impractical, children not doing well in school for late meetings, bad or changing doctrine, scriptural or organizational problems, mistreatment by the flock, and so much more. Then there is the issue of what finally made you decide to leave and how: getting disfellowshipped, disassociated, or faded. Finally, there is the issue of what you decided to resume doing once you left.

Anyone who had common ground in the "truth" is going to probably find even more common ground once they leave. There are so many excellent apostate Web sites, including this discussion board. There is Crisis of Conscience by Raymond Franz. Just staying on this board, even just lurking, is going to open your eyes to so many other possibilities. And it's so much more exciting here than going back there.

penny2

As a fader, it can be a little scary talking to other ex-JWs (as strange as that may sound). Unless you know them really well, you don't know how much you can tell them and what they're going to pass on to JW family or friends.

I had a confidential chat with someone who was attending almost no meetings. Next thing I know, she's at a CA, talking to some of my family about our conversation and sounding very much like a "zealous sister" again.

LongHairGal

Penny2:

I can relate to how you can't quite trust those that are out or semi-out. For some reason, many of them feel they need to sound zealous to other JWs. They may very well relate your conversation.

What if somebody is not "out" yet and is fading. I am in this category and I can't afford to have some guilt ridden ex-JW go back and blab.

LHG

greendawn

Not all ex JWs have that much in common since they take different ways some become atheists others catholics, born again, wiccan etc it's a very mixed lot. They have thus failed to organise anything substantial against the WTS. With some there is also the feeling of having been disgraced by having been expelled from the once revered group which produces inhibitions against creating that powerful anti WTS network.

Thus the FDS's dread that the ex dubs are fully organising against them has not been fulfilled.

Rabbit

Greendawn
They have thus failed to organise anything substantial against the WTS

The beauty is ex-JW's have become individuals and this web-site is full of the type people that the WT truly fears: People who think for themselves.

Not organized ??? It's a little scary the first time, but, y'all owe it to yourselves to attend an ApostaFest.

Rabbit

jaguarbass

If you were so shallow that the only thing you had in common with your mate was the religion. I guess it shouldnt be a big deal to divorce each other.

dedpoet

They have thus failed to organise anything substantial against the WTS

I disagree. The child abuse lawsuits, and there may be a lot more of them
to come, are fairly substantial, I'd say.

We ex jws act as individuals, and are thus unpredictable as far as the watchtower
is comcerned. While we know what to expect from them, they have no idea what
we are doing against them, which scares them.

I stay in contact with a few ex jws and, of course, I'm married to one. Some I
know who left I haven't maintained contact with. I guess if we shared interests
as jws, we might keep in touch when we leave

Once You Are Done, How Do Ex- Jehovahs Witnesses Relate To Each other?