INCOMING!

by RollerDave 9 Replies latest jw friends

  • RollerDave
    RollerDave

    Well, I'm going to have visitors this saturday...

    It's a long tale, but it DOES have a point, I promised at one time to post about the ugly PoA mess, and these visitors are directly involved in this ugliness.

    My dub niece and her hubby, who haven't seen fit to have any contact with me in over three years called me out of the blue offering me my dad's old furniture, so I'm going out there to pick it up in my van, but then they are following me back home to 'hang out and maybe grill some stuff' just as if nothing's changed, but a lot HAS changed.

    We recently had a battle in my family over my aging mother's PoA because she has the early stages of Alzheimer's and the family broke into factions along unexpected lines.

    The primary combatents were my two sisters, Mrs. PO who is the third child (I am the fouth), and SRLB who is the youngest of us five.

    The other players are my two brothers, 'non-dub', the oldest, and 'DF', the second.

    well, non-dub molested SRLB when she was eight, just once, but that is a million times too many and after years of seeming to tolerate his presence when she HAD to, she decided that she could never forgive him for 'messing up her life.'

    When non-dub was down on his luck, Mrs PO lets him live in a room in her house. Very untypical behavior for a dub.

    SRLB 'personally disfellowships' Mrs PO, I guess you can be shunned even if you ARE in 'good standing', and the wife of the PO at that!

    Then DF gets DF'd and runs off from his family to to be a 'kept man' of a woman living off a large amount of alimony. He's a jerk, but I'd have run from THAT bunch too!

    So then Mom is diagnosed, SRLB was the one the Dr told, and the first person she calls is DF! Nice to know where I stand, below a DF'ed one!

    Df gets the boot from his girlfriend/keeper and winds up living with non-dub, who now has a house and a wife nobody can stomach. I call her Princess High-Horse. She is DF's keepers best friend and they introduced her to non-dub

    Then SRLB produces a PoA mom had given her years before and declares that mom needs 24-7 care NOW, she proposes DF moving in with mom citing an '02 KM as precedent.

    Odd thing non-dub was solidly on SRLB's side even tho she cannot seem to forgive him.

    Mom is understandably alarmed when MR SRLB, who is an MS tells her, 'don't worry yourself about it, we have the paperwork we need to be sure you wind up where you need to be' Translation: we can put you away, muahahahaha!

    After much yakking, mom tries to do a new PoA naming Mrs PO with my full support, after all she did a great job with dad's and is my only decent sibling; and most importantly, she would act in MOM's interest, not her own, or DF's.

    mom makes the mistake of telling non-dub, who tells Princess High-Horse, who calls DF's keeper, who tells DF, who calls SRLB.

    Geez.

    SRLB informs us that she 'went to a lawyer' (a paralegal brother) and was informed that since mom has alzhiemer's, she is not able to execute any legal papers, so Mrs PO's papers are not valid. Then she goes and files her papers with mom's dr's and attempts to shut us all out. She also wants him to sign something saying mom needs 24-7 care NOW!

    She goes to Mrs PO's daughter and turns her against Mr's PO, so this poor sis of mine has now been DF'ed by her little sister and her own daughter without any recourse!

    So it was me and Mrs PO against the pack of wolves, dubs, non-dubs, adulterers, a child molester, and his victim!

    I advised Mrs PO to see mom's Dr and have him write that mom was able to make these choices still, which he happily did, then execute new papers on the same date, PoA, advance medical directive, Will, all that. So they did.

    This action is unimpeachable and sound legal strategy, there is nothing SRLB can do.

    When she heard, she went critical mass. we told her we'd gotten the Dr. to sign, and she says, 'is your Dr a lawyer?' with this sickening tone, as if her para friend was one either.

    In the end she yelled 'I'll see you in the new system!' ar mom and ran out crying. very mature.

    She 'made up' with mom, but hasnt given up, see, she thinks having PoA means 'mom loves her the most' GADS!

    Now for the point...

    Why did that niece shut me out after we had been so close?

    Some years ago SRLB calls me up, which was odd, she only ever calls when she wants som,ething, and got to talking about why I had left. She goaded me for 45 mins during which time I was open about reading whatever I wanted, including so-called apostate material, and she eventually got me so heated up that I may have said something to the effect of 'I don't owe those bastards in brooklyn a damn thing, in fact the sons of bitches can KISS MY ASS!'

    Having got what she wanted, the rest of the call was pretty short. She promised to put together a packet of info on how I was wrong about our dear brothers, and got off the phone, then called everyone else and put me in the worst possible light. That Self-Rightious-Little-Bitch!

    I think my visitors on saturday are going to try for a repeat performance, get me rile, jot down my finely crafted invective, and use it to drive a wedge between Mrs PO and myself, leaving her vulnerable to attack from SRLB.

    You know, I don't think the WTS has done my family any good, but I also think they'd be a bunch of fucking pricks in ANY religion.

    So, this saturday I will be studiously refusing to discuss anything religious, not evidencing any sign of apostasy, and curiously unarmed.

    Everything they see/hear will make its way right up the grapevine of assholes to SRLB and DF, my mortal nemesis.

    Of course, they COULD be just interested in seeing me again, and I would be ok with that, but I tend to lean towards this being a recon visit.

    Just the way I wanted to spend a saturday. I'm doing it for mom.

    Fine kettle of fish since the other day she informed me that SRLB calls me 'the evil slave' then added 'I love you as my son, but she's right, because you ARE against the truth'

    I told her, 'I'm not against truth, OR God, but I AM against the WTS, goodbye, click'

    Always fun, those dubs.

    Roller

  • Rooster
    Rooster

    Wow I thought my family was screwed up.. Best of wishes for your mom. God speed RollerDave

  • Stealth453
    Stealth453

    Wow I thought my family was screwed up.. Best of wishes for your mom.

    That goes for me too, bro.

  • RollerDave
    RollerDave

    There's times they remind me of the children of Oberon in the Chronicals of Amber by Roger Zelasny.

    Mom could never handle teenagers, having never emotionally progressed much beyond that point her ownself, so me me and SRLB were farmed out to the older kids, I lived with non-dub and then Mrs PO, while SRLB lived with DF, I guess that might explain the loyalties a bit, but not completely.

    As an open, unapologizing apostate, gun-nut conceal carry proponent, almost sickeningly patriotic American, it's almost inconcievable that my best and closest family connection is a sister who is the wife of the prsiding overseer of the congregagtion where I was told I didn't need baptism because as a 'retarded person' (?!?) I was under my Mothers grace.

    I would think non0dub, and DF would be my buds, we ARE brothers and all free of the control tower, but just as being IN the JWs doesnt make you automatically good, neither does being OUT. I've no use for evil or stupid people in ANY religion.

    And you would think SRLB and Mrs PO would be close, both dubs in good standing with hubbies that are moving up up up in the company. but nooo, vinegar and baking soda.

    SRLB really baffles me, Mrs PO is evil and not supportive of her for allowing non-dub to stay when his alternative was sleeping out of doors, even tho she is a dub with a certain status, but DF leaves his family, gets DF'ed, lives as a 'kept man', and takes up residence under the roof of non-dub but she doesn't see fit to shun him.

    Makes no sense. When mom goes, I'm out of this state.

    Thnx for your comments,

    Roller

  • Mum
    Mum

    "Retarded?" Where did that come from? You make me wish I had retarded relatives instead of such self-righteous, narcissistic, bullying, control freaks. The only reason your family sounds almost more screwed up than my own is the dub element. Most of my family are non-dubs, or dubs in name only, knowing how to play the system, several systems at once.

    Leaving the state worked for me long ago. If you need pointers on where to move, post a thread asking each of us to advertise our respective parts of the country. I live in Nevada, which is a really good place to make a fresh start.

    Wishing to put the fun back in dysfunctional,

    SandraC

  • Scully
    Scully

    With family like yours, let's hope you've made up for it in excellent friends.

    Truthfully, I would get the furniture (if you really want it) and then say that there's no way in hell that you're going to let them follow you home. The last thing you need is for them to think that you owe them something. You don't. They treat you like crap, yet they expect to be treated like honoured guests in your home, eating your food and accepting your hospitality, when in reality they just treat you with contempt. F*** that.

  • undercover
    undercover

    Wow...I had to read that twice to get all the players right.

    Stephen King couldn't make this shit up if he tried.

    I don't have anything to offer other than to echo the comments of others...I thought my family was screwed up.

    And best of wishes to the health of your mom.

  • unique1
    unique1

    Jesus!!! when people get sick or die, for some reason family goes crazy. I have witnessed it many times but have never truly understood it. You have my sympathy.

  • mkr32208
    mkr32208

    Wow that's like a soap opera script!

    I would go for the sarcastic but can't be baited tactic. If they say "well the end will be here soon." Reply "well I sure hope so..." With a big smile. If they say "it'll be fixed in the new system..." Little pause, then "Sure,,, Um sure it will"

    (go to youtube and watch Jim Gaffigans beyond the pale routine and try to emulate his poise and comments when discussing moses and the burning bush)

    You have to bear it you might as well have some fun!

  • RollerDave
    RollerDave

    Mum, yeah, I was surprised to learn that a retarded berson could have an IQ of 165, but an elder said it, right?

    lol

    As for the furniture, it IS mine, dad gave it to me before he died, it's time.

    As for the cookout, it wound up being cancelled. Not sure what to think of that, Niece might have changed, but was close at one time, I really am curious how it would have went. Her hubby is a pretty ok sort who refuses to play all these familial wargames. A fair hand with a guitar too.

    kinda funny how I post here and get a call cancelling....

    Oh, btw, the REAL soap opera bit is when my best friend moved in with me and the wife, and I turned into the 'roomie'!

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