This e mail has probably been posted before but I just thought I would pass it along again.
It is obviously tongue in cheek but still I know many dubs do feel this way...
A new way to handle those pesky little "conversation stoppers"
1.) 'I'M NOT INTERESTED' You might say:
"Well, many feel the same way, and they're
called goats in the Bible. Let me share with you a
scripture that talks about the fate of those goats.
(Read Matt. 25:46) Do you want to get cut off? Do
you WANT to take a dirt nap for eternity?!"
2.) 'I HAVE MY OWN RELIGION' You might say:
Well whoop dee doo! "Yeah, and I have MY own religion
too. Its called the "TRUTH!" See I'm what you call a
"Christian" (Make the double quotation gesture with
your fingers.) You know what "Christians" do?
They preach to people. Those that don't preach to
people are on that "broad and spacious road." Here
let me show you in Matt 7:13.
3.) 'I'M TOO BUSY' You might say:
"No you're not. You were probably watching TV
or kicking back right? Don't lie to me. Do you know
who the father of the lie is?
It's Satan!!!................Is he your daddy?
I think he is!"
4.) 'I'LL READ YOUR LITERATURE IF YOU'LL READ MINE' You might say:
Hey, this isn't a hostage negotiation here. I'm
not going to read your stinkin literature! I came
here to preach to YOU remember?........... Now, if you
want to preach to ME, you'll have to get up off YOUR lazy
behind, and come knock on MY door on a Saturday
morning. But don't bother because I'm NOT INTERESTED
in your beliefs, because I HAVE MY OWN RELIGION, and
I'M TOO BUSY in the work of the Lord to
READ-YOUR-LITERATURE-IF-YOU'LL-READ-MINE, JUNK! Then
slam THEIR own door in THEIR face!
OKAY!!!!!! So who wants to make a car group for this
weekend?