did anyone feel they were just a programmed robot when a dub

looloo

did anyone feel trapped , i used to say i wish i had never heard about "the truth" as i was happier when i believed i would go to heaven when i died than armageddon stuff that scared me so much .

jaguarbass

I havent been a dub since 83.

I feel like a programmed robot living in America. It seems like all I do is eat sleep and work over and over.

Then I get 2 days off and I eat and sleep.

IP_SEC

no, I enjoyed the occult and science. Sex and masturbation.

I knew I would die at armageddon and was at peace with it.

Maddie

No I was too much of a rebel for that but there were a few who seemed to function like robots.

The neverending three meetings a week + field service routine gets people into a treadmill type of existence where so much of their spare time is consumed either preparing for or engaging in JW-related activities that it all becomes automatic; no time to step back and contemplate. This is perhaps as much of a reason as any to why JW's are so afraid to leave the faith. The loss of the JW routine after so many years. 'What will we do on Tuesdays, Thursdays, Saturdays & Sundays?' LOL

Tired of the Hypocrisy

Not at first but I came around to it.

WTWizard

I felt they were trying. They succeeded in managing my time, for a while (that is, until I moved and started going to two different congregations and left both hanging). They knew I had Tuesday and Thursday nights off, so they expected me out in field circus every Wednesday and Friday morning, no matter what. And there was no way I could blow off the boasting session: until I moved within walking distance of the Kingdumb Hell, someone (a hounder) always picked me up (unless he had a talk out, in which case I could "forget" to call for a ride).

They also managed to program every move while I was out in field circus. For instance, slipping and sliding on the ice was forbidden. I could not even get more than about two steps behind or ahead of the group--if I got too far ahead, they would tell me to stop "running"; if I dropped behind, they would want me to keep up. There was also no enjoying the landscape, normal movement that was not part of the misery, or enjoying The Price Is Right when it was on. About the only thing that was bearable was when they forgot things, something went wrong and we had to quit early, or if someone was playing some rap music for me while we were out in the street.

What they were not able to do was program what music I listened to. They wanted to get me to listen solely to Kingdumb Sxxx in lieu of music. They told me to throw away albums (the whole album) for one bad song. I just put them aside, and later I more objectively listened to them. And I didn't erase all the tapes I compiled with those "bad" songs on them, so they were still accessible. The result is that I had quite a few worldly CDs, even while I was a witless. I never gave them the time to thoroughly go through the record and CD collection--maybe that's why I managed to hold onto Hotel California without its being censored.

MOG

I remember before I left back in '88-89 I was hitting on a sister - FINE AS HECK- and she shot me down and told me "your not spiritual enough"..DARN IT..