" I would take a bullet for you!"

by AK - Jeff 9 Replies latest jw experiences

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  AK - Jeff

  I recall that statement being made in the car groups of pioneers I was in at times, when we would talk about our 'brotherhood'.

  I meant it then. I ponder it now. I ponder whether I would still take a bullet for my former Jw friends should it arise? Do I really possess 'unconditional love' for them? I speak often of how conditional their love really is [in a general sense - organizationally], and wonder if mine is the same? I have left them - they mostly hate me now. They would not take that bullet for me - I have no doubt. In fact, a great many of them would rejoice that I took a bullet - one less evil apostate to stir up the organization!

  So I marinate these thoughts for a couple of days - and I think I really would take a bullet for them - my love is unconditional. At least I hope it is - I don't want to be the hypocrite that derides them for false love, and then be just like them. Or do I?

  The irony is that after I died for them - they would not come to my funeral.

  Jeff
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  Tired of the Hypocrisy

  These are people like any other human being. I suppose your actions would speak to your own set of values and ethics. I have risked my neck to save others without wondering if they would return the favor. Well, not while I was actually moving into harm's way for them. My own values dictate to me that all human life is of some value. I am not saying I would jump in to save a murdering scumbag, but most anyone I cross paths with on the street would get my help if needed. These pioneers may hate you and shun you, but I can't believe that hating them back is a good thing. In your shoes I would just wait til the moment and see. You might be surprised how you behave.....
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  B_Deserter

  I think love is a two-way street. I don't feel that you are really under obligation to love people who don't love you.
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  AlmostAtheist

  Not being a JW brings some strange responsibilities with it, doesn't it Jeff? You loved because you HAD to. (One brother referred to agape love as "Love ya 'cause I gotta") I mean, maybe you would've anyway, but the rule overrode any emotion on the subject.

  Abortion? Wrong. End of discussion.

  Is the Bible completely true? Yep.

  Is there a God? Well, DUH!

  Now that the JW rulebook is tossed aside, you suddenly find yourself burdened with coming up with your OWN answers to these questions.

  I've pondered the 'take a bullet' question too. I concluded that I would RISK my life for them or anyone else, but I wouldn't GIVE my life for them. The level of risk I'd be willing to take increases with the level of love I have for the person in need. There are a select few I would actually *give* my life for.

  Dave
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  R.Crusoe

  SO long as you feel that in the 'moment' of any moment you have behaved according to all that your 'senses' rightly or wrongly informed you, there is little for anyone else to have to say about it - though many will as always is the case!

  I see situations often where 'ex cult' people get 'tested' by regular groups in social settings just to see their reaction. Eventually the individual will deliberately perform in ways which challenge all their perceptions simply because that is what they are doing to the individual! So everyone leaves as confused as before they started!

  We are a crazy speceis who 'know' often nothing, about what we think we know!

  And the truth that lives in you, feeling you would die for another seems as burried from others appreciation of your true inner self as it is possible to be. And the irony is, like your funeral, that their mallaise at your heart condition by them is the most likely thing to get you to not take a bullet for them.
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  Earnest

  Hi Jeff, may I recommend the novel "The Fall" by Albert Camus. I read it many years ago but it still resonates when considering whether I would give up my life, not only for my friends, but for others as well.
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  AK - Jeff

  I've pondered the 'take a bullet' question too. I concluded that I would RISK my life for them or anyone else, but I wouldn't GIVE my life for them. The level of risk I'd be willing to take increases with the level of love I have for the person in need. There are a select few I would actually *give* my life for.

  Dave

  Well, of course, Risking life, could mean, Giving life up, right? It would not be out of any sense of wishing to give up my life, of course. But I would take the risk that could end up that way.

  I believe that I am thinking more metaphorically than anything else here. You are right, Dave, about the rulebook and what we do after the rulebook is gone. I guess, at least for me, I cannot live in the company of people that I really did, legitimately, love, for almost 4 decades, without Real attachment. I am just a sentimental fool I suppose.

  I have always said - and of course nothing is universal - that the cream of the crop of Jw's are the ones who have left. Especially if we left due to discovery of matters that bothered our consciences. The jw's - supposed to be the best of the best among mankind - would gladly watch us die without compassion. In fact, they would actually stone us if they could.

  An interesting mental algorithm at least.

  Jeff
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  StAnn

  Hi, Jeff -

  I thought about this with the firefighters at the WTC on 9/11. They probably knew going in that they wouldn't come out alive. However, when they became firefighters, they made a decision that, if necessary, they would give their lives to save others. When push came to shove, they did it. No one made them become firefighters. Self-giving was in their nature.

  The same is true for many of our soldiers and sailors.

  I think there are two categories of people in this world, givers and takers. You sound like a giver. So, if you saw a person in trouble, even a JW who had mistreated you, you would probably do everything you could to save them. They may not do it for you but that's okay. You're not doing it to be treated well in return. You're doing it because you feel it's the right thing to do.

  There are givers and takers in every organization, in every walk of life. The JWs are no different. Just be true to yourself and don't worry about others' motivations.
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  R.Crusoe

  Good points about givers and takers!

  If you atre amongst like minds I imagine it is excellent!

  I need to find a group of givers to spend my life amongst because otherwise I may just give it all up! I'm done with this place!
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  VoidEater

  I think love is a two-way street. I don't feel that you are really under obligation to love people who don't love you.

  I think I'm agreeing - I don't think you can love if it's an obligation. I think I'm disagreeing - I don't think love only occurs on two-way streets.