isnt it a given?

Solace1998

.... that you would feel bad about wronging Jehovah first and foremost, in the light of a serious sin? Elder:
", "how do you feel about who youve affected"?
well, ive affected the prospects of learning the truth of the girl i slept with and dated, Ive affected her non-witness family's view of the truth, ive affected her witness family's spirituality, ive hurt the congregation ive been in, and i lied to my good friends about what was happening.
"what about Jehovah"???

--well of course, Jehovah! He is the reason i felt compelled to bring this up, because i know he can see all things, and i have let him down

(sighs heavily in disbelief) "ok, finally"

changeling

Explain yourself. You seem very troubled.

changeling

Mysterious

Like anything in a high control group they want to control everything, including the words coming out of your mouth. It does not matter if it is a given or not, it is important for them to control what you say especially when you have proven they cannot control what you do.

WTWizard

You have really only affected yourself and the person you had the affair with by committing fornication. No one else is really involved (true, the family may end up having a grandchild as a result of it, but it is your responsibility, and the person with whom you had the affair, to take care of it.

Aside that, there really is no big deal. You have not done any direct damage to any organization. You have not done any direct damage to the family or their reputation. You have not done any direct damage to worldly people or their families. In fact, it is that the witlesses make such a big deal out of petty things that did all the damage (and advertise it so heavily). If the organization takes a hit on account of this, it was their own doing because they make problems where none should have existed.

Just to show how simple morals should be. And what happens when we make a simple issue needlessly complicated.

yknot

Okay I am a bit perplexed...

The Eldum wasn't the sharpest tool in the shed....happens a lot in congregations were Elder appointments are based on social politics.

But according to scripture citation in the OD book ...(James 5:16)16 Therefore openly confess YOUR sins to one another and pray for one another, that YOU may get healed. A righteous man’s supplication, when it is at work, has much force.

So all should have ended on a happy note, since the person confessed and repented without the need of reproof!

If I am missing something please explain a bit deeper Solace.....

WTWizard

And Jehovah? He has no fxxxing business in trying to decide who one should have relations with in the first place! If it affects Him, it is also because He tries to make simple issues needlessly complicated. And I have no pity for any damage this has on Jehovah, who should have kept His fxxxing nose out of it in the first place.

Hope4Others

Hey there....

try not to be too hard on yourself.....things happen. You are carrying a tremendous amount of guilt there. We are all human, how

does the girl feel? Are you still dating? You can't continue to beat your self up for whats happened..the religion makes us carry a heavy unnecessary weight

of guilt and shame. Remember Jesus said his load was light, I think...I'm a little rusty. Gods not as harsh as he's made out to be by Jw's as if they have the corner

market on God and know what he really thinks. He freely forgives all.

hope4others

Solace1998

it wasnt an affair, we were dating.

lisavegas420

well of course, Jehovah! He is the reason i felt compelled to bring this up, because i know he can see all things, and i have let him down

that was the reason I ratted myself out for having unmarried sex.

I should have just kept quite..no one would have ever known, the sex was over anyway........ I wouldn't have been df'd and lost contact with my parents and siblings.

lisa

James_Slash

Solace,

I got reproved in 2000 - I felt as if my whole world came to an end. I lost my privileges as a result. I was embarrassed, humiliated and it started the slow fade.

The Elders said that they would support me back to 'spiritual health' but they never did. I remember once being asked to do the gardening at the Kingdom Hall because no-one else wanted to do it. When I refused, an Elder said to me "its a privilege to do the gardening!". I said to him "don't you remember? I don't have any privileges!". He just looked at me in shock!

I look back now and wonder why I got so upset over it all. Time IS a great healer and you'll find yourself.. I would never encourage anybody to leave who wanted to be in it. I left for the simple reason that after my reproof in 2000 I lost all interest. I tried moving to another hall to rebuild my standing, but I still felt the same so it was time to call it a day.

All the best with it, but try not to worry!

isnt it a given?

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