Since you didn't get presents "year round", do you go overboard now?

by WingCommander 8 Replies latest jw experiences

  • WingCommander
    WingCommander

    There is another thread being discussed as to if you got gifts throughout the year as JW's claim. Many like me, whom were raised in the JW's, either had poor parents or picky ones that claimed you were being "materialistic" if you wanted toys, gifts, nice clothing, etc.

    This made me wonder, since we were somewhat deprived of the nice things that others had growing up, does that make us more apt to buy the "best of everything" now....that is, if we can? Also, what about gift giving? I actually just gave my brother-in-law 2 tickets to see a RUSH concert for his B-Day and they are good seats - almost front row! He was floored...it was his dream to see RUSH, he's 46.

    For instance, since I had some college education and now have a fairly good job, I'm able to save money and get whatever I want, without having to ask anyone if it's ok, or worrying about if it's too "showy", or to "materialistic." Some of this comes from the fact that growing up I always saw my parents buy junk, crappy clothes that never lasted, used junker cars that cost more to repair than what they were worth, etc. So, I learned somewhat of a lesson from that: I save money now to buy the best that will last the longest. Period. I don't care what is, how much it costs, etc. If I want it bad enough and it costs more than I can afford at the moment, I'll save to buy it. (I have great credit, but no debt besides the mortgage)

    Since I was 18, I've had 2 brand new cars. First new VW lasted me 10 years and 140K miles, and I just traded up to a new Audi A4 2.0T Quattro. That should last another 10!!!! TV: Sony Bravia 46" LCD with DirectTVHD. (Hey, we weren't allowed cable growing up) Appliances: Bosch stainless steel all around. Guns: Custom 1911, Match Target Ruger, other custom pistols, etc. Watch, modified custom Omega Speedmaster, HW. 3575.2000. Lawnmower: new Honda...lasts forever. If we need clothing, we may go to Kohl's to save money, but I still get the designer or best brands. No more Goodwill stores for me, and certainly not for my children! Been there, done that crap growing up. No more suits from Sears either. Jones New York and Ralph Lauren fit me great from S&K menswear. Shoes? Italian leather Bostonian Stradas. (8 years old, BTW, and still like new) You do get what you pay for I have found.

    Please forgive me, I did not mean to sound like I am bragging, but I guess in some ways I do want to show as well that not all X-JW's end up on welfare shooting heroin chasing the dragon around their HUDD house like the JW's would have you believe. The only thing I have to chase is my son around the in-ground pool that covers most of my backyard when he doesn't want to come in!

    In some ways, I feel like maybe I am over-compensating for having next to nothing growing up, and now that I am grown up and fairly successful I can just go get what I want, when I want...and to hell with anyone who doesn't like it. No excuses for having something nice, no more having to feel guilty because I drive a fast red car. To hell with all of that guilt!

    Does anyone else feel this way, or have a similar attitude of, "I'll get what I want now to make up for growing up poor" attitude? Again, sorry if I sound materialistic. I am happily married with a son, so it's not like I don't have anything to fill my time, it's just my general attitude of wanting the best for myself and family.

    - Wing Commander

  • Hecklerboy
    Hecklerboy

    I go really overboard when buying gifts for other people. I put allot of thought into it and really try to get them something that they will love. I tell them I've only been celebrating holidays for about 10 years so to me it like being a 10 year old again.

    Sad part is, I tend to deprive myself too much. I'm always trying to justify buying myself something or making sure I'm not wasting my money. Although I just bought a Harley and I'm starting to customize it. So I think I'm getting over that.

  • Solace1998
    Solace1998

    i didnt have witness parents, but gifts were given to me by friends pretty often - sometimes in the form of just money, one time literally the shirt off of his back. Not to mention the many times i got bailed out of sticky situations monetarily, or someone paid for dinner, etc...

  • Finally-Free
    Finally-Free

    Some might call it going overboard, but I'm willing to pay more for a quality product. I found that paying more initially for quality products means I don't have to replace them too often, saving me money in the long run.

    W

  • TinyDancer124
    TinyDancer124

    Only when it comes to Christmas and birthdays. I spoil my daughter, nieces and nephews like crazy. My mom (a JW who buys her grandchildren birthday presents and goes to their parties...just don't tell anyone) says she wishes I were her aunt lol.

  • bluesbreaker59
    bluesbreaker59

    I spoil my fiancee like crazy. She's a very simple easy to please woman though, and is truly grateful and appreciative for everything. I also buy the "best I can afford" on things for myself. For clothes, I'm a T-shirt and jeans type though, and Levi or Tommy Hilfiger at the Outlet Malls are just fine by me. I still have a pair of Doc Marten boots that I got as a HS graduation present from my mom. On my guitar gear, which I use as "tools", I try to buy the most reliable and dependable with the nicest warranties; that usually means more up front cost, but not always. I also know what I want and sometimes that's just a cheapo, beater guitar. One of my main guitars was only $150 brand new.

    My JW family was very materialistic, and loved having "the best". They like showing off their "best" too. We shopped at Younkers or JC Penney or S&K for our suits. We certainly didn't wear Walmart or Sears clothes. But my family was also bargain hunters, my dad and grandma especially. Dad still haggles for all kinds of things, always searching for a better price or negotiating, he loves it. Grandma loved Cadillacs and Buicks, and last I knew she still had one.

  • dinah
    dinah

    When my kids were younger I would go overboard with Christmas. One year they had so many gifts I let them open one a day for three days before Christmas. Of course, now they are older so their gifts are much more expensive, but I still get them what they want.

    I also have a memory for birthdays. I never forget them. Since we had to ignore birthdays, it makes them more special to me now. It's a day to tell your friends that you're happy they were born!

  • White Dove
    White Dove

    Wing Commander,

    Marry me! I'll make a great second wife.

    Heckler,

    I do what you do. I buy as nice as I can afford for others but not for myself.

  • White Dove
    White Dove

    I'm reliving a sort of second childhood with holidays. I go all out to experience what I missed as a kid.

    It's not as fun without family to share it with, though.

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