When I was a witness we would tell the public that although we didnt keep Xmas or birthdays etc,we made up for it the rest of the year and even have special occasions for giving at other times.
Well,the reality,for me as a kid,and my other brothers and sister was that we didnt cellebrate cristmas and didnt celebrate anything else so we went without,there were practically no times for giving or recieving
How was it for you?
Merry Christmas substitute
by cornish 8 Replies latest jw friends
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cornish
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Sirona
The same. I went without...and I said to people how nice it is to give when you are not under pressure, but in actuality I cant remember ever having a present from anyone at the hall.
So much for generosity. People in my family wondered why the JWs seemed to have a lot of money, well lets face it, no xmas or birthdays saves a lot of money!
Sirona
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ashitaka
Never any presents here either...almost seems like an excuse to be cheap....
ashi
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joelbear
We were fairly poor when I was a kid. My father didn't believe in gifts, even for my mother on their anniversary. He basically thinks sentimentality is a waste of time. Mom gave me gifts all the time and tried to make my life as happy as possible. My big brother also gave me a lot of things through the years as I was growing up.
I never felt deprived because of no birthdays or christmas. I got an allowance and saved up for the things I really wanted. I had plenty of toys and games. What I really craved was more attention from my parents.
Joel
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TheOldHippie
Well, I gave my youngest daughter a CD yesterday, I gave my wife a CD today, I sent 150$ to my son today because the police took 300$ from him which he had gained from drug trafficing, I gave my DF'ed daughter 2,000$ last month to spend on her honeymoon in connection with her marriage, I also paid 1,000$ for "my side's" part of the costs, I give my son money every month or so, I paid 5,000$ in an attempt to get him out of the drug hell this summer, etc., etc., so I guess they get quite a bit. We just ain't all of us evil, you see ....
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outnfree
OldHippie,
You really just don't get it, do you? Out of all the things you mentioned, only two would actually meet the category of "presents" -- well, perhaps, three, if one counts the contribution to your daughter's honeymoon. And they were CDs!!! The others are just the normal things ALL parents, husbands, fathers, do for their families.
Nobody called you evil, either. We're just making an observation here. And as a former JW parent, I, too, gave my children the occasional gift from time to time (when non-JW hubby wasn't giving them B'day and Xmas gifts) but I rarely took the time to make the gifts "special" by wrapping them, etc. (Hangs head in shame.) The only "special occasions" I can remember having for my kids is a "Hat-Making Party" when the girls were about 6 & 4, another "Pizza Party", a few congregation gatherings at our house, and ice cream cakes after dance recitals. Not much in 11+ years...
So I would have to say from personal experience that not many JWs DO actually make up for the lack of regularly scheduled, so to speak, holidays that enforces worldly gift-giving.
outnfree
When the truth is found to be lies
and all the joy within you dies ... -- Darby Slick, Somebody to Love -
Seeker4
We had three children we raised when both my wife and I were JWs. AT LEAST once a year we had parties with gift giving that included grandparents, aunts and uncles and cousins. My wife, who is still a JW, continues to give tons of gifts to her kids and grandkids now.
We also had music parties, dances, costume parties, etc. Anniversaries are also BIG gift giving times for us, as well as several other JW friends. I organized tons of what would be considered big get-togethers for the congregation when I was an elder. Talent shows, formal dances for teens, etc., often with a bunch of kids from a number of congregations.
Not huge, but maybe 40 or so. We never had any serious problems - though I did get a bit of flack from time to time - which I did not put up with lightly. Pity the fool that dared hassle me about giving kids a good time!!
So not all JWs were anti-party assholes. Though I do remember DO Dennis Raftopolis really dumping on the elders meeting at the circuit assembly one time about Witness parties. He said at one costume party someone came dressed as Geo. Washington "What's next, General Patton?" he asked. Dennis could be fun - but a clueless company man at times.
S4
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joelbear
Maybe if you hadn't been Jehovah's Witnesses your son and daughter wouldn't be so screwed up.
Sorry your family has so many problems.
The Making your Family Life Happy book just didn't work I guess.
peace
Joel
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Yerusalyim
My wife and her ex were actually pretty good about giving gifts to thier kids throughout the year. However, until me they boys had never recieved a gift that was wrapped. It was fun to watch, still is. Garry is supposedly bringing the two boys down to S.C. at Christmas so they can see their mom and he can see Sean. I've told my wife I will in no way compromise my celebration in order to make him feel better. Should be an interesting Christmas.
YERUSALYIM
"Vanity! It's my favorite sin!"
[Al Pacino as Satan, in "DEVIL'S ADVOCATE"]