Sometimes you have to make a stand. And sometimes maybe you shouldn’t?
I think overall I am happy with who I am right now. In the past I would go with the flow, keep my mouth shut, and make sure I was liked as much as possible by everyone I could manage to keep happy. I’d smile and agree with the group, tell someone what they wanted to hear whether it was true or not, whether I believed it or not. I could fool myself and say it was for their own good…but really, when we are less than forthcoming and honest…who is it for? Who gets to enjoy the acceptance,smiles, etc from the person we didn’t quite tell the truth to?
I was in a situation where someone I care about very much was involved with someone who I knew something bad about, not as in from their past, but current. I battled within for days trying to decide whether or not to say anything. But my love for them and the relationship of trust we have left me with only one option. I made the phone call and the other person was ousted.
A week later they were married, and now everything is different. I know I did the right thing. I did what I would want someone else to do for me. Only now I am the outcast because of it. I am the one who lost something. My mother is now distant from me, and I don’t know if things will ever be the same.
I have been feeling pretty bad about it, wishing I had just faked it and kept on going, acting. But I know I did the right thing. I have two family members out of the truth that I can call family…she is one of them. I miss it already and can’t quit crying over it. Yea, I'm a 35 year old man and my mom can make me cry. Bite me.
Then today I logged in to my old source of comfort and see people with so much in common drawn up in arms and pissed off at each other over the “right” to pop into any conversation on a forum and say anything they want. Some folks even saying goodbye over it. I have news for some of you guys who don’t already know it…nothing that has been said or done is new, and nothing anyone here does is going to change much of anything. When it comes to the evils of the world, saying whatever you feel like saying on a forum seems like pretty petty stuff. I’d give up all rights to say anything on any forum for my real life to be somewhat smooth.
My life is still a mess today…but after reading some of that…I have to say thanks again for putting things in persective. If all someone has to worry about is whether or not they can hijack a thread…maybe take some time and write out a post on how I can get my life so freakin great that my big concerns will be similar.
It’s a whole lot easier to tear things down than to build them up…but the view is better when you build something good. Make a stand, but do it where it counts…and where someone can see your face…if you have the courage.
WLG