This Way To The 'Lash And Spittle'

by hillary_step 5 Replies latest social physical

  • hillary_step
    hillary_step

    Hello,

    One or two WTS Fredian slips :

    Seek Those Rightly Disposed for Everlasting Life. - Any topic of conversation used in the house-to-house ministry should be introduced in a positive, pleasant way. But no one should use a shocking introduction, such as, "I have a message for you from outer space."........such an introduction might well make a householder wonder whether the Witness should be taken seriously or dismissed as quickly as possible.

    The householder might also breath a sigh of relief, recognizing that the JW is unhinged after all.

    w77 6/1 328 Combating Bible Illiteracy in France. - This sincere Catholic accepted a home Bible study and ended up by quitting the Catholic Church and resigning from his position as philosophy teacher in a Catholic school. He accepted a menial job, and he and his wife became baptized Witnesses at the Divine Sovereignty district assembly held in 1975. He concludes his report by saying: "Today, my mind is no longer polluted by Babylonian mysteries and philosophical gobbledygook.

    A teacher whose mind was filled with Babylonian mysteries and philosophical gobbledygook was I suspect teaching under janitorial pretenses, imagine his poor students having to wipe the drool from his chin with his wizards robe.

    w99 5/15 25. A Source of Strengthening Aid In the congregation, therefore, crushed ones find the warm atmosphere of a familylike environment.

    Ahhh! Now I understand. Get a few crushed ones, warm them up and bingo, fermenting sheep. Anyway, what the hell is a ‘familylike’, some sort of Greek guitar?

    Such instruction is not gained by delving into filthy and degraded perversions done in secret and then relating them publicly. The mind is not cleansed by feeding on filth, no more than a sow is washed by wallowing in the mire. Real Christians are neither prudes shocked by clean sex nor perverts stimulated by sexual immoralities. Their mind is open to clean instruction but closed to degrading obscenities.

    OK folks, this way to the ‘Lash and Spittle’. Obviously Nathan, Fredian and You Know, had just returned home after a few jars of Guinness when they decided to get into that article.

    Benefiting From Your God-given Conscience. - The elders in one congregation write: "In one wedding all the bridesmaids walked down the aisle fanning themselves. The next wedding had to outdo the first, so the bridesmaids walked down the aisle twirling umbrellas. The next had to be bigger and better; they wanted twenty bridesmaids and twenty ushers. The hall was starting to be used as a circus.

    Just a quick note in reminder; Circus acts in Kingdom Halls are not merely restricted to weddings.

    Best regards - HS

  • Pathofthorns
    Pathofthorns

    Thanks for the laughs. These people need to get a grip! LOL

    But this one that I hadn't seen in a while really cracked me up:

    But no one should use a shocking introduction, such as, "I have a message for you from outer space."........such an introduction might well make a householder wonder whether the Witness should be taken seriously or dismissed as quickly as possible
    There was always some spiritual geek that would take creative introductions just a little too far...LOL

    Path

  • ozziepost
    ozziepost

    Well done, H.S. Thanks for the research. It gaves us the laff of the day!

    Cheers,
    Ozzie

    "It's better to light a candle than to curse the darkness."
    Anonymous

  • Tina
    Tina

    (((( hillary)))))excellent and witty , as always!!! lolol Thanks for the morning smiles here :> 'message from outer space' lol. I remember seeing that one lol made me think of theocratic coneheads lol.luv,T

    Vive Bene
    Spesso L'amore
    Di Risata Molto!!!

  • waiting
    waiting

    Hello Hilliary,

    Just a quick interruption........I e-mailed you last week, but as of yet - haven't received a response.

    Did you receive the e-mail? If not, please let me know, and I'll resend it, as it's important to me.

    Thank you.

    waiting

  • Duncan
    Duncan

    HS

    I especially liked the line about the familylike.

    Great stuff

    D.

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