Any help will do

by Rethinking 8 Replies latest jw friends

  • Rethinking
    Rethinking

    Hello All,

    I don't post often, but read posts VERY often on the board for encouragment. Haven't been to a JW meeting in about six months. I started going again after not going for sometime. I guess I was still unsure. I was positive six months ago, though, that I didn't want to return to that kind of life - if that's what you want to refer to it as. I'm about to throw away all of the literature that I have as a celebratory-purging and may have a potential relationship with someone who doesn't believe in God. Go figure!

    My continuous struggle in making new friends is that I'm in the habit of "disfellowshipping" them, if you will. If we have slight disagreement or I feel that they do something that doesn't meet my "approval", I find myself not speaking to them for some time or the classic avoidance behavior. They know about my past and can understand the baggage I carry. However, I'm afraid that they'll soon tire of it if I keep it up. I really am trying to get away from that mindset, but it is very difficult and it bothers me so that I can't sleep here at three AM.

    Any suggestions or help will be greatly appreciated.

    Thanks,

    Rethinking (who name should be changed to Convinced)

  • quietlyleaving
    quietlyleaving

    Hi rethinking -

    A short course in assertiveness training may help. Some you can do online. I'll try and find something for you to have a look at and decide if you think it might help.

    My problem is similar to yours. I have become so independent that I'm heading towards being a complete maverick and apart from everyone else

  • Witness 007
    Witness 007

    You have only just began "the journey" out and you have many hurdles to jump...time will help you alot, and think positive!

  • quietlyleaving
  • jamiebowers
    jamiebowers

    Please read Steven Hassan's Combatting Cult Mind Control. It will help you to realize your authentic self and stop the need for group think.

  • BabaYaga
    BabaYaga

    Ditto in suggesting Steven Hassan's "Combatting Cult Mind Control". It helps you understand how and why you got there in the first place and what to do to make it better.

    All the best to you,
    Baba.

  • Quirky1
    Quirky1

    Rethinking, You will need time to readjust.

  • oompa
    oompa
    convinced: I'm about to throw away all of the literature that I have as a celebratory-purging and may have a potential relationship with someone who doesn't believe in God.

    you do know that if you try to burn it all you cant.......it wont burn...lol

    yeah you need TIME...it is your best ally.....that and finding a new friend here on jwd that you can hopefully meet and get to know.....i dont know if you are single but just finding somone for some poontang is really good!......also.....i hang out with a TON of DF people around here!.....they are frikkin everwhere and hanging with young people is fun for me......since my young 20s son is df and has tons of df friends that works out for me.....sometimes i take a bunch on my boat to fish or wakeboard......and it cracke me up......oompa...in "good standing"........going off with 5 df kids on my boat the "USS-DF" we call it!....my wife knows and i make no secret about it to any dub.......oh and if you have some real close jw friends and you let them know you have just lost your faith and explain why......you may be surprised how they will NOT shun you.......i have about 8 like that......i can tell many feel it is not all the truth..........

  • Rethinking
    Rethinking

    Thank you all for your responses. I will definitely read the suggested materials and take my time.

    Oompa, you're hilarious!

    Rethinking - b.k.a Convinced

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