I've only posted here a few times but have read here for years. Let me just say that you have all helped me feel so much better about myself. It is nice to know that there are others that have gone and are going thru the same things as I. Anyway, I was raised a JW but have been successfully "faded" for about 10 years except for one area. My family (mom, sister, aunt & family and an uncle still think I am active). They live back east and we don't hardly ever get to see each other but when we do, I go there, they never come to me, I live in California. Anyway, it's been 4 years since I was last there to visit and am going to see my beloved momma soon. She is pretty sick and I love her dearly though she is 100% devoted to JW org. she could not take it if she found out I was out of the borg. So, even though I am a grown woman in her 40's I still live the lie when it comes to this area because I could not take not talking to my mom and sister and would hate hurting her if she found out the truth. So instead of rambling on I will ask my real question. I need to know if there is anything drastic I need to know that has changed in the borg in the last 4 years that I need to know so I don't "slip up". I know that there is only 1 weekday meeting but how long is it and what do they study? I won't be there for the sunday meeting just during the weekdays. It is really hard skirting all the spiritual talk when I am there. Jeez, I just want to spend some time with my mom! I love her and miss her so much. Last time I was there she actually asked me to say the prayer at one of the meals. I felt so terrible offering up pray in her house under the circumstances but I did it because I didn't know what else to do. My father was the presiding overseer for many years before he passed away 10 years ago. I would never been able to pull it off when he was around and probably would have stayed in out of fear of lossing them all. Please, any helpful info is appreciated.
I'm going to visit the family and need some help
by supersab 3 Replies latest jw friends
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karnage
I can surely feel your pain. I went back home to visit my family a few months ago and let me tell you... they eat, drink, sleep, and breathe the organization. My mother is a full time Pioneer and I stayed at her house while I was visiting. Saturday bookstudy was held at my mother's home, and when I returned to my mother's home that morning after being out all night... she had introduced me to all of her friends. Here I am, both ears pierced, dreadlocks, and a carefree attitude. You should have seen the looks and stares that I was given. I loved it. My cousin tried to give me a serious preaching to, but I told him that I'm not trying to hear any of that. I was respectful. I think that is the real key. You have to be as respectful as you can. Yes, they are going to say things to you that are going to aggravate the crap out of you, but remember the purpose for your visit. Eventually, you'll be heading back home.
You can only love them.
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garybuss
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You might have had a happy childhood and your parents were nice to you. I didn't and mine weren't. I'm not much for playing games or misrepresenting myself. The way to keep people from finding out something is to tell them. I'm happy to deal with reality and I'm open to all who treat me and who treat people who are important to me with respect.
If you don't like me for my religion or maybe my lack of religion that makes you a bigot and you don't meet my minimum standards for association. Jehovah's Witnesses is nothing but a bigotry club. They're nothing to fear, they're incredible.
One of the best days of my life was the day I realized I had nothing to loose to the Jehovah's Witnesses. I left them with a challenge: Defend that which you claim to be the truth or admit it's not. I'll meet that defense with Watch Tower Corporation produced literature and first hand testimony of 300 victims of Jehovah's Witness abuse.
The Jehovah's Witnesses started their fight with me but I get to finish it with my rules, on my terms. I like to keep a reasonable distance from believing Witnesses. I've found 100 miles to be a reasonable minimum distance.`
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I quit!
I agree with Gary however I feel it might be a little short notice to level with them before this visit. It could turn the visit into a disaster. That being said I think you should consider leveling with them at some time in the near future for your own good. Ten years is a long time to live a lie and I have to think it is taking its toll on you. I find it funny how they love to cry about how some of them are treated when they become JWs yet have no problem with the hateful way they treat those who leave.
If I were you I'd try to avoid talking to them about Watchtowery things. Even not know about something written in the Wt a week, a month or a year ago could cause them to wonder about you and ask more questions.