Learning to give -- the value of traditional special days

by NanaR 4 Replies latest jw friends

  • NanaR
    NanaR

    Hey all,

    Last Saturday, I gave a birthday party for my grandson who lives with me. It was the very first time that I had given a birthday party myself, although I have helped with a few in the past couple of years.

    Before the party, my best friend kept the birthday boy for a few hours. She took him to WalMart to buy his birthday present (let him pick it out), but she told me the whole time that he was saying, "I wish I could buy that for Hannah. I wish I could buy that for Annabelle. I wish I could buy that for Mom."

    At his party, a couple of people gave him money. So since his Mom's birthday and his cousin Annabelle's birthday were both last week, I asked him if he wanted to take his money and go buy them presents. He was delighted!!

    So yesterday we went to WalMart and he bought Annabelle a toy and his mom a candle (he smelled every candle in the row to find just the right one). Then we went to Annabelle's party, and he was so proud to see her open his present. I also picked his mom up for the party (I'm making dinner for her today) and he gave her his present. He even bought a card and signed it himself (he's 6).

    My point is -- the traditions of special days that most people have in their lives are not so much about getting (if they're done properly). They are about learning how to give!

    I don't know how many times I have heard the comment that Witnesses are "tight" or "selfish". While that certainly is not the case with all Witnesses, the fact that it seems to be prevalent tells me this: People need the life lessons in giving that birthdays and other holidays provide.

    Teach your kids to give by giving them the opportunity to receive and to give. When they receive, they learn how good it feels. That makes them want to give to others.

    Just my 2 cents.

    Pax,

    Nana Ruth

  • is there help out there
    is there help out there

    To get what we want to get out of life we must give. My land lord lives across from me and they have three girls and a boy and are spoiled rotten.

    Last summer her parents were away and she has a mersedy bends and it stated to leak gas. So I help here by putting a pan under the gas tank.

    I did not ever recieve a thank you. Last week she left her light on so I told here parents. I did not even get a thank you from her. Next for all I care when she goes to work at 6.00 in the morming she will find a dead battery. They think the real word is like mommy and daddy and we are just out they to give and serve them. Are they in for a shock.

  • shopaholic
    shopaholic

    NanaR,

    Glad to hear the birthday parties went well!!! You are absolutely right about the JWs. The majority are NOT givers. They say there is not a need to celebrate birthday's, mother\fathers days, christmas, valentines and any other holiday because you don't need a certain day to give gifts. According to them you can just do it on any day.

    However, I've never seen a JW just give a gift out of the blue. I use to do it a lot in the hopes of it catching on and the JWs would tease me and say I've created my own holidays. I'm the only sibling that has ever bought my dad a present in the past 30+ years of my mom becoming a JW, EVER! When I've tried to organize a day to celebrate our parents (this is when I was super active) in a holiday/BD neutral month, my siblings still refused to participate, saying that we would simply be celebrating mother\father's day on different day and that we trying to find a way to be like world.

    I agree that celebrating holidays when done correctly can teach a person how to be thoughtful and selfless, if even for a day. And it ensures that we all have a reminder to honor and/or give to the special people in our lives.

  • is there help out there
    is there help out there

    The most joy I ever got was when Santa gave Lionel trains for Christmas when I was a LIttle boy. I will never for get. I will almost bet that a JW child never recieved a train.

  • chickpea
    chickpea

    excellent point, nanaR

    one i shall be certain to pass along !

    my youngest kid is doing a semester at
    the local elementary school working with pre-k's
    in the morning....

    i will share your insights with him, since he
    attended the same elementary school as a
    born-in dub (stoopid mommy, sheesh)

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