UK'ers only - Benefits of a Safe House

Celtic

Many we know on leaving the JW's feel incredibly isolated. On top of the problems directly associated with this feeling of isolation, often there are many other factors below the surface compounding and therefore hindering cognitive recovery.

For some the problems seem only slight, for others they are enormous and suicidal feelings may be the end result due to a belief that no-one understands or can help in any way at all.

On the ground support for former Jehovahs Witnesses is very very limited within the UK. Although if you fall into many other categories, i.e. ex offenders or belong to certain racial minority groups you will find that at least there is some enabling assistance available. Not so for former cult members, perhaps due to very insignificant members of the public having any real foundational knowledge of the overlapping issues and the disabling effects of these.

I for one many times longed to know of a 'safe house', a place of refuge where I could go to, to share with others, their experiences and to perhaps charter new ways of thinking in enabling individuals through sharing to participate more freely with local community life.

If anyone is interested in taking up some research of the viability of accessing this provision, would you please avail others the opportunity of viewing your thoughts here, or feel free to email me at anytime: [email protected]

http://www.can-online.org.uk
Your One Stop Shop For Everything Related To Community Regeneration And *Social Exclusion Issues*, Check It Out Today!!

Kind regards

Mark

Englishman

Leavers from the dubs definitely need another ex in their lives to aid the transition.

It was easy for me, I was one of the Portsmouth "Dirty dozen", most of whom left around the same time, so I was never alone.

Having said that, I am willing to talk by telephone to anyone who is looking for some support. Just email me aand I will respond.

Englishman.

Bring on the dancing girls!

Celtic

Fee Fi Fo Fum, I smell the blood of an Englishman -

Wriggles 'her' bellybutton suggestively for him.

Anyone else any views on a retreat and safe house / provision?

All the best!!

Mark

Simon

I think 'safe house' maybe a bit too strong a word for someone just leaving the truth. If they are in danger because of physical abuse then it is a different matter and a physical place is needed.

However, for JWs I think it is more emotional support and friendhip that is needed. Just someone to talk to even!

I think you're right that there isn't the support in the UK that there could or should be which maybe because we're all so shy and retiring and aren't as good at putting ourselves out as others do.

We would be happy meeting up for a drink or a chat with someone who needed to or to talk on the phone etc...

If anyone is like me and finds the idea of meeting up with someone a bit intimidating, it may be an idea arranging a day out somewhere that people could tag along more informally such as the zoo (esp. for families).

I have seen also some web sites for UK support but I don't know if they are 'other christian groups' trying to get in contact with leaving JWs - if not then it would be worth looking at what is already there that we could lend a hand to.

anglise

Do you really think there is a need for a literal 'safe house'?

As has been said most exiting jw's need to talk to others who understand.
I know that is what I needed more than anything else. Failing that, reading personal accounts from the many web sites also helped a great deal.

I dont know if I would have been happy having a face to face meeting with a stranger.
I think the idea of talking on the phone or at least initially via email is a good and non threatening start and I would be happy if anyone wants to email me with that in mind.

ISP

Its a funny business. We note quite a number who have left but still seem to think it is truth! Not sure what sort of help they need! In the UK about 50 a week leave. Where they go exactly I do not know. We maybe have about 20-30 UK posters here....but there are 100s ....1000s that we do not know of.

ISP

Celtic

Boy, some of you are so ruddy negative about the possibilities, the resources that can be tapped into and the possibilities that are available, you really disappoint me sometimes.

OK then, there was a good many times, especially in the first 4 years or so after leaving that I went though absolutely agonising periods when all I could think about was committing suicide to block out the pain I was going through internally. Its all very good for those of you that have already a nice home, a family to support you, and the luxury of a computer to enable conversations with others. What of the many 'have-nots'?

How many leave and end up on the street, with the possibility of facing long term homelessness, no money, years of compounded mental neglect and trust in others that has been wiped out from their lives? How about focussing on the worst case scenarios, to try to build networks to assist the ones who fall through just about every social welfare provision?

Just because you happen to have fallen on your feet, coming out of the experience relatively unscathed, does this mean that there is not enough care or consideration for the many 10's or perhaps more who do not have anywhere to turn?

You really stagger me some of you. Do you suppose in the few times when I was homeless that a visit to the zoo for a day out is really going to do anything at all? Why cant one or two of you be prepared to get off your ruddy soft backsides and at least be prepared to do some research into this, for the benefit of those ones? Why is it that the 'have nots' feel like they have to bash their heads against brick walls for someone to take notice of their plight? Really, what is it with you guys?

Some of you absolutely stagger me and in all honesty, I'm ashamed by this attitude of non caring for others in far worse off situations. You really want to do something? Visualise yourself from outside of your own cosy perspectives and upbuild with empathy instead of constant put downs in the misconception that the ruddy internet is the only way forwards.

In disgust of the attitude shown so far.

Mark

Latte

Celtic,

When we first left, I really needed to talk to others who were in a similar position ourselves, it was certainly good to talk to a couple who post on here. Thanks to them![]

Also, I do recall reading a National newspaper problem page, where Dr Miriam Stoppard gave a telephone number for anyone wanting help in dealing with JW related problems (no I don’t think that it was the bethel number! LOL) I really wish that I had jotted the number down. I think that perhaps there are people out there that can help, it would be good.

Personally I would much rather meet a person in the flesh than write.(writing is certainly a plus, also!) I don’t know why, I just feel more comfortable……..nothing nicer than meeting someone and having a relaxed coffee……Blueberry Muffin……Chocolate Bun OR a glass of wine…..Olives…cheese…..mmmmmmm……….. Sorry got carried away!

For me meeting a stranger who you know is on your side, is much more palatable than knocking on a strangers door…..anyday!

Just my opinion!

Latte

sleepy

Personnaly speaking I would love just to meet up with someone in a pub for a chat over a few pints .Any takers?

Celtic why are you so upset?
Just because people may not have the same vision as you does not make them any less a person.
I think like you it would be good to have a suppport group.
But not everyone is in a position to help easily.
There are some like me who need to keep a low profile in order to help people we know of.
If we blow that cover people may lose their life line.

UK'ers only - Benefits of a Safe House

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