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ptucker8357

Ok, so now, I think the initial shock of all this is wearing off and anger is replacing it...

Today makes 5 weeks... 5 weeks since I had a study with my "study conductor" and 5 weeks since I have not heard the sound of his voice... This person was someone who espoused integrity, love, brotherhood, justice, compassion, and on and on... I was told that central to the JW religion was the ministry.... the ministry comes first, everything else second... Having bible studies was integral... and since we lost our jobs, it appears no longer convenient to have a study, so I am dropped like a lead balloon...

I am mad for two reasons: For 4 years, this guy to be my friend... He worked directly for me and it's clear now that he did this to his own advantage. Why would you not be friends with the boss... I favored him in most situations... a very bad thing to do in business but apparently I was too naive to see it... He saw the opening and he took advantage of it... shoot man, how stupid could I be...

Second reason is the study... We would so it at the beginning of the day at work or at the end when no one was around. Again an easy an convenienet way to get your field service requirement completed... Now that the convenience is gone and I maybe haven't progressed as far as they would like, I am history... what is up with that...

Some advice please... there is no way to get to this person... he no longer has a phone and he will not answer his email... I need to close this off somehow... should I send a letter or something to get this off my chest and let him know how under-handed I think this has been... Maybe writing it down and sending it off would alleviate some of this anger? Or should I be the better person and just let it go?

ptucker8357

... sorry, I forgot to put the subject line in...

cognac

I'm testing this to see if I can now post a reply...

cognac

Ok, I can post a reply now. I think I couldn't before because there was no subject.... I'm not sure. But, I will copy and paste what I said in the thread I started to reply to this:

I'm sorry that you are going through that. It is terrible. What happened to his phone?

Are you sure he is checking his email? Are you sure he is not just stressed or depressed about losing his job?

Have you thought about just showing up at one of his meetings to ask him? Maybe there is something going on that you don't realize... I don't know what else to really say except that I'm really sorry...

troubled mind

First off I am sorry you are taking this so hard .

However you really don't know what is going on in this guys life ,do you ? He could be severely depressed or be facing some doubts about his religion or maybe there are problems at home . Even if it is as you think and he dropped you as a freind because you were not progressing in the religion , do you really want that kind of friendship ?

Whatever the case , face it he no longer wants to be your friend . Period ..his choice . Nothing you can do about it other than move on and cultivate a new friendship some where else . Frankly you sound a little needy obsessing over this so much .

Do what you need to get it off your chest . Write him a letter explaining in detail how you feel about all this, mail it ,then be done with it ! Do NOT expect a response and an apology ....justt know you explained yourself and move on buddy .

ptucker8357

You're right... I am obsessing, but you know what? After having someone pretend for almost two years to be your friend and attempt to radically change your way of thinking, and then to drop off the face of the earth?!?!?! I think I have a right to obsess... Oh, I'll get over it... I am just venting... that's all... I hope poster on this thread and on JWN understand that...

drew sagan

I would only add that on his end he may be feeling that he spent two years of friendship and never got a convet

Consider yourself grateful that you haven't been sucked into this religion. Let this be a lesson that teaches you better ways to look at life and move on. People have lost much more because of the Watchtower (need I say "blood policy!")

lurk3r

" he no longer had a phone and he will not answer his email."

He worked for you? Did you personally lay him of tucker? Is there a chance that he is bent outta shape or something? Your right though, it was an awfully good position for him to be in for the time being. It could be that the elders in the hall might have said something to him even.

I assume you live in his proximity? Perhaps write him a letter and hand deliver it, while looking him square in the eye? Make him promise to read it too as it may be harder for him to discard it that way.

If you do it write a letter...keep the beginning of it non hostile. For all the things you have read here that you know about, just take one or two points and let those sit in him. If you give him too many points to think about, he may forget them all - cause really HE WANTS to forget what you say. Keep it simple.

You have every right to fight bud, and you should. Do it strategically though, perhaps one day he may thank you...

Best of luck.

cameo-d

If you were responsible for him having a job, he may have some resentment about the job loss.

If it were me, I would not write a letter until you see him in person and really know his state of mind. You could be waaay off base and end the friendship by doing something rash.

Maybe he has something serious or traumatic going on in his life and you don't even know about it. I say go see him in person and find out what's wrong. Then, if you get the cold shoulder, you can write a letter.

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