Advanced flame war rules for ex-dubs
1. Ask your antagonist if they are still a Witness.
2. Predict the death of this discussion board if they keep at it (doing so at the end of your post giving you the last word.)
3. Tell your opponent that the argument is over, because their arguments have degenerated into pointlessness.
4. Start pointing out all of your opponent’s grammar and spelling mistakes and tell them to get an education and then come back and argue.
5. You should frequently refer to the hordes of lurking supporters who are on your side (these are pretend people of course) and claim they have emailed you privately telling you what an idiot this guy/woman is.
6. Also accuse the person you are flaming of trying to intimidate your friends, and jump on the “I will not stop saying what a low life you are.”
7. You should try to impress or silence this dummy by discussing your professional credentials and experience related to the topic at hand (but be sure to be vague about the details because you’re probably lying through your teeth.)
8. Accuse your opponent of being a newbie or overly sensitive and tell them they need to harden up outside in the real world.
9. You can post a really horribly vicious note about your antagonist and several minutes later, post a apology, and wipe your post, claiming that you intended to send the message privately to someone but were just caught up in the battle.
10. If your opponent is a woman, suggest that hormones or PMS might be the blame for her normally out of character viciousness, problem, etc.
11. Claim that outside of the Borg, everything is only a matter of opinion and there really are no facts or “truth” any more.
12. Or you can claim that facts are absolute, and they can’t argue with what you just said.
13. You can play word games by redefining them to mean what ever you want them to mean.
14. Refuse to do any research to see if what you posted was correct, after all you have a perfect memory you know.
15. Make sure you ask this poster to supply lengthy and detailed references for every statement they make.
16. Let them know if something works for you, it’s gotta be right for everyone. If it doesn’t well they are a complete brain dead dub.
17. Make sure you know the battle style and tactics of your opponent by looking through their previous posts and discover how to press their hot buttons.
18. Never post your argument in the adult or disagreements section because you know you really thrive on the attention you get from trashing someone.
19. Use every trick in the book to make your opponent feel bad, or better yet make them cry. After all if they were dumb enough to argue with you they deserve it don’t they?
20. Don’t worry that everyone now knows how to use these tricks and rules of flame wars and that your job will be a lot harder to trash someone because lots of people are going to call you on it.
Best Bet: Practice your best JW pretend outfit, you know the wolf in sheep’s clothing bit, and go sic some dubs someplace and make them even more paranoid about using the Internet to get help, or you can just walk away from flame bait knowing you damn well know all the tricks in the book to flaming and you don’t have to prove a God damn thing.
Skipper