Yesterday, the company I work for had its annual golf outing. I was teamed up with three other guys. I was playing the worst round of my life, which is saying a lot. Then, on the ninth hole, something happened, something profound, that would change the course of history.
We were playing best ball, which means we would all hit from the point of the best shot. We hadn't used a single one of my shots up to that point. We were on the green, on the ninth hole. I estimate the shot at about thirty feet. It was angled downward approximately 5 degrees, with a slight curve to the right. Even completely sober, which at that point I was not, it was an impossible shot for a golfer of such minimal talent as myself.
At that moment, I turned to my teammates, and loudly, and somewhat incoherently proclaimed, "As God is my witness, before the 18th hole is done, I will do something to help this team!" Immediately after that, as I readied for my putt, I saw the heavens open up.(Maybe it was the clouds parting to make way for the sun. The weather was kind of funky yesterday.)
As my club made contact with the ball, my body felt a strange sensation, as if some strange, cosmic force were overtaking it. I followed the path of the ball, and I could almost see the hand of God guiding it into the hole. A perfect shot, to the amazement of myself and my teammates. We birdied the ninth hole.