Or are the two connected?
Is it easier to recover from physical abuse or mental abuse?
by The Berean 8 Replies latest jw friends
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flipper
I think it's a challenge for people to recover from both physical and/or mental abuse. They can be connected yes, and many times are . Or- they can be seperate. Lots of variables here. The WT society is mentally abusive to many of it's members without being physically abusive. But- people who suffer child abuse, or spousal abuse suffer physically and mentally- so there are lots of various situations that occur
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FlyingHighNow
They are connected. Both kinds of abuse cause physical and emotional pain. Both cause scars.
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startingovernow
I'm wondering what prompted you to ask...
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restrangled
Its been shown many times over, mental or verbal abuse is much more damaging. So many suffer in silence, there are no scars, or proof that it ever happened. Physical abuse is obvious, acknowledged, and the body heals eventually. Physical abuse is just as damaging, but at least visable to others that it happened and acknowledged if brought to the public eye.
The other is just insideous....no one knows, and no one ever hears except the victim.
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Lady Lee
You can't physically abuse someone without the emotional abuse
You ca emotionally abuse someone without ever hitting them
Which is worse?
First, let's take the term "abuse" as something that happens many times, not just once. Just so we aren't confusing it with a mugging.
Any time you double up on abuse it will be worse because it is affecting no t just one modality but two.
If we take just the physical component of abuse, bruises, broken bones, welts - they heal. They are also easy to recognize. You KNOW when you have been hit.
If we take just the emotional component it is a lot harder to identify. A person says something hurtful and when you cry they say it was just a joke, You question your reality. A person threatens to hit you but doesn't actually do it - well that might be harder to recognize as abuse especially for the victim in the situation.
If we don't recognize something as hurtful, as abusive, it makes it much harder to deal with. You can't point to the bruise or the black eye. All you may have is hurt feelings that are dismissed.
In the late 70's and early 80's when researchers were beginning to write about abuse issues didn't even consider emotional abuse as something to ask the people who were participating in the studies. It probably wasn't until ACOA groups started expanding their mandate to include Adult Children of Alcoholics (ACOA) and Dysfunctional Families that people began to seriously consider the impact of emotional abuse on children.
The Battered Women;s shelters initially only took women who were battered. Emotional abuse just wasn't considered serious enough to warrant a space in a shelter.
We've come a long long way.
We now know that emotional or psychological abuse can often more paralyzing than physical abuse. It took a lot of research and education of professionals to understand this and provide services to people who had been emotionally abused.
Spiritual abuse is also a component of emotional and psychological abuse. Threats, coercion, manipulation, fear induction, control of information and power are all aspects of emotional abuse. I've taken a couple of books about emotional abuse in families and shown how easily they can be expanded to include all aspects of spiritual abuse.
- Toxic Parents Toxic Religion 1
- Toxic Parents Toxic Religion 2
- Emotional Abuse and JWs
- Emotional Abuse and ex-JWs
- Emotional Blackmail and ex-JWs
- Addicted to Misery
There are plenty of other books that show that the same methods of control and manipulation are used by abusive parents, spouses, companies, countries (dictatorships) and yup religions/cults.
I think that as long as we don't identify abuse for what it is we cannot truly get out from under the control. We might get away from one abuser only to find an abusive spouse or boss or get involved in some other high control group.
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The Berean
Dear startingovernow:
As I read through the many threads, it comes to mind that most JWs were not physically abused (some were) Yet, it seem that the anger and resentment last for decades due to the mental manipulation that many former members suffer. How can we compare those affects to rape victims, children beaten by parents, wives beaten by diseased husbands, or gang-related violence. It seems about the same ...
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AllTimeJeff
The damage of abuse, so as to be able to quantify it or measure it, must be done against the backdrop of the individual. I don't know if this is an answerable question. Abuse and its damages is disgusting, no matter physical or emotional.
And yes, the two are often interconnected.
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IWillBeDubbedNoMore
I can't see how anyone could experience physical abuse without experiencing some kind of emotional abuse. I, don't think it can be measured which one is easier to recover from. I would think that the rate of recovery would depend more on the degree of abuse and the resilience of the individual. Abuse of any kind is horrendous.