"The Thought Police are onto me!" or "So a cult member says to another cult member..."

by sd-7 5 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • sd-7
    sd-7

    Greetings to all. Yesterday's meeting was rough. I admit I intentionally waited till my mom was gone, then sat in my bathrobe and played Super Star Wars on my Wii for about a half hour before finally getting dressed for the meeting. It was fun.

    Afterwards, the COBOE himself (coordinator of the body of elders, for those who've been out awhile) approaches me and says he wants to meet with me, along with my Field Service Group Overseer. Less than awesome. Unsurprisingly, the COBOE finds himself distracted and quickly acts like I don't exist anymore. "Hmm...should I, or shouldn't I? Yeah. I should." So I take the opportunity to leave.

    Mom dragged me out to field service. I felt guilty for placing one Awake! magazine. What really surprised me, and provided a great window, was my mom going on about Jim Jones. (Yesss...I can insert 'how cults work' without her defenses being up!) Steven Hassan's book kicked in, and I explained the BITE model and how deception and mind control are used. "Where'd you get that from?" she said. "Well, people have studied the psychology of it," I replied. She spoke of how one Bible study encountered someone at work who said the JWs are a cult. The study said she'd prefer to investigate that herself. (I thought to myself, gee, she may not have all the information she needs to make that decision...) I added that, "Obviously, if you ask someone who's in a cult if they are in a cult, they're not going to say yes, they're going to say..." I trailed off, realizing that I was about to say, "They're going to say what we would say, that they follow Jesus." It's hard to be careful sometimes...

    Mom finally asked me, "So do you think we [JWs] are a cult?" If I said yes, I knew it would immediately provoke her. After a long pause, and a sly smile on my face, I said, "Certainly...Certainly not." "I don't think we are," Mom said. But something in her voice said there was just a tiny doubt there. It seemed like a stand-up moment, "So a cult member says to another cult member, 'D'ya think we're in a cult? I don't think we are.'"

    Anyway, any suggestions? I'm scared of facing the elders now. I've missed half the meetings and I've done 1-3 hours a month in field service at most over the past five months or so. I missed one month. ... I know they don't hold my fate in their hands. It's just...do I want to end it now, or play their game? Figure the less I say, the better off I'll be.

    Speaking of which, I better sign off. Looking forward to your thoughts and apologizing for this long entry.

    SD-7

  • sd-7
    sd-7

    Whoops! Wasn't payin' attention. I meant to put this in the 'Friends' section. Sorry...

  • jamiebowers
    jamiebowers

    Use the depression thing...tell them you're under a doctor's care and will call them if/when you need them. I would tell your mom the same thing. Sending you an email later today...was busy over the weekend. Glad to see you on the board!

  • boyzone
    boyzone

    sd-7 well done for going careful and not raising mom's defenses. Don't be afraid of the elders, they're nothing. You are in control of your life, not them. Don't give them any more control than you want them to have. As Jamie suggested, use any legitimate excuse to get out of seeing them.

    When the elders wanted a word with me, I said I'm not ready to speak yet and I wanted to be left alone, I said if I felt I needed their assistance, I'll let them know. After that they backed off.

  • choosing life
    choosing life

    I think you answered your own question. The less you say, the better. If you are still dependent on your parents for a living, things can get rather touchy.

    You can use depression or just say you lack motivation to go to meeting/field service. That would be true enough.

    I don't know your situation, but if your young, you need a plan. You need to build up a network of friends outside the jws. Maybe you can go away to college?

  • AllTimeJeff
    AllTimeJeff

    You let it out that you think JW's are a cult to another JW. While you are correct, that has consequences.. If you want to stay and fade, do the depression thing.....

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