Saint Bubba's Gospel

by Satanus 6 Replies latest jw friends

  • Satanus
    Satanus

    THE GOSPEL ACCORDING TO
    ST. BUBBA

    CHAPTER ONE
    Bubba maketh a sacrifice; the LORD doth appear, and putteth the smack down

    IN the beginning was the Word, and the Word had too many syllables, and the Word had only one syllable, and that was still too many for Bubba.
    2. And Bubba lived deep in the land of Dix-ie, a fair country, where the smell of gunpowder and barbeque was thick among the trees.
    3. And Bubba did have a double-wide, in which there was a TV set. And it came to pass that satellite TV came into the land of Dix-ie. And Bubba did rejoice exceedingly at the coming of satellite TV, because of the porn thereof.
    4. And Bubba spat out his chaw onto the linoleum floor of his trailer so that he might speak. And he spake, This here's mighty fine porn, and yea, there is NASCAR racing and WWF in abundance. For these things, we give thanks to the LORD.
    5. And Bubba did take his dawg Skeeter out back among the rusty car parts, and even among the old tires did he take him. And Bubba did anoint Skeeter with Quaker State, and prepare to offer Skeeter unto the LORD with his 10-gauge.
    6. But Skeeter was lousy with fleas and mange. And he had eaten of the neighbour's cat, and did puketh, even at the moment of sacrifice. Yea, he did puketh mightily.
    7. And therefore in the sky there was a noise as of thunder, and the voice of the LORD did speak at Bubba's feet, from a rusty paint can.
    8. And the paint can did flame, but was not consumed.

    Read the rest of st bubbas gospel @ http://www.haidi.org/ulrojr/bubba.html

  • unclebruce
    unclebruce

    Verily I say unto thee Saint Satan that thou art a dark stenchfilled stain upon the fabric of Simons new threads. Go forth at once and scrub thy mouth afresh in the obsevations and deductions of Monks of letters and learning, hitch up thy trailer to the caravan of raptuous glorious fundamentalism and return here forthwith a better and more noble man.

    Gospel according to UncleBishop of Bablebelt

  • Satanus
    Satanus

    UB

    Do you think what i posted is just a stupid parody? There is a message in it this time. I would have thought that you of all people would get it.

    SS

  • cellomould
    cellomould

    I don't get the point either.

    I do, however, find it amusing.

    cellomould

    "All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing." Edmund Burke

  • unclebruce
    unclebruce

    Sorry SS,

    I thought my reply was sypatico with your point .. Wasn't the point that biblebelts breed redneck hillbilly fundies? Please explain. (i'm ok at making riddles but not too good at decifering 'em ;)

    unclebruce

  • Satanus
    Satanus

    UB

    Ok, i see you got the point alright. I got your point too, i guess, but i didn't fully percieve the angle it was coming from.

    Happy pointed postings
    SS getting a new thinking cap

  • Bendrr
    Bendrr

    Thank you for reminding me of why I will never again live in a trailer. (for the record, the trailer I did live in was NOT in a trailer park! I will live in my car or under a bridge with the bums before I live in a trailer park)
    Mike, of the Still Proud to be a Southern Redneck class

    I may not like what you have to say, but many men gave their lives for your right to say it.

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