Email & Texting.....The JW way of personal communication

by Girlie 7 Replies latest jw experiences

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  Girlie

  I came across an email this morning from an old JW acquaintance, stating that she hasn't heard from me in a while (about 4 or 5 months) and was wondering how I am doing. She goes into this spiel about how she is mentally exhausted from family, ministry, etc. She then ask me to contact her at home after 3 p.m., leaving her phone number. Ummm... she is wanting to talk to me, not the other way around. Therefore, she should pick up the phone and call me. My number hasn't changed in the past 3 years I've had it.

  I am noticing that my JW associates would rather email or text to communicate with me than call and it makes me wonder if they do this because they are either too busy to use a phone or if they feel that the distance somehow protects them from any imagined standing they have of me.

  I know that this isn't only in the realm of JW, but has this been your experience and what are your thoughts on this?
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  rebel8

  I don't know about dubs, but I often suspect this is done to stroke one's ego, so they can think you like them sooo much that YOU called THEM. Or they're just lazy, or shy about making the first call.
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  finding my way

  Maybe she lost your number or deleted it and she doesn't want you to know that she doesn't have your number anymore..
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  JWoods

  Maybe she wanted a record of the conversation to give to the elders?

  I would not put it past some of these cut-throats.
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  babygirl30

  I used to do that myself...when there was someone I didn't SEE a lot, i would email/text them to 'check up' on them and let them know I was thinking about them. Wasn't because I was OVERLY concerned or that it really mattered - it was an EGO thing! It was done to stroke my haughty ego...so that I could say "Oh yeah, I just emailed sis (xyz) to see how she is and she hasn't replied - must be up to no good!" hahahaha. NOW it sound ridiculous but back then it made all the sense in the world to me.
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  Olin Moyles Ghost

  I don't think it's a JW thing. And you may be reading too much into it. I would even dare to suggest that she's being considerate.

  Since she hasn't seen you in months, she may not know your schedule--i.e., when is a good time for you to chat. So, she told you that after 3:00 is good for her. This gives you the choice to call her at a time (after 3:00) that's convenient for you. And you have the choice to simply not call her if you don't want to.
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  LongHairGal

  Girlie,

  I thought the same thing myself. I have a JW acquaintance who would e-mail me from time to time with those stupid jokes and nonsense stories or chain-type e-mails. I think that this is supposed to suffice as 'communication' or 'friendship' to somebody they would rather not really be friends with. That way they can think to themselves that they keep in touch.

  They want to delude themselves that they are being friendly but they are not. It got to the point that I didn't answer those types of e-mails. If there isn't any real communication or question I saw no reason to. I know we live in the age of e-mail and it is acceptable but I consider it a little tacky and the easy way out for somebody who is just going through the motions. I saw a lot of this in the religion. People who wanted to give the 'appearance' (and it IS all about appearances) would sometimes host a large gathering and there would be a 'blanket' invitation to a lot of people. I didn't like to go to these because if the host didn't personally invite me I don't consider myself invited or friended, if you want to get right down to the point.
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  Girlie

  Rebel (love the name): That just maybe it. A stroking of the Ego.

  Findingmyway: Could be the case.

  JWood: She is a typical, self-righteous RP, which is why I stopped calling in the 1st place.

  babygirl30: Funny yet sad at the sametime and wouldn't be surprise if the many of them were that way.

  OlinMoylesGhost: I know it isn't just a JW thing, but I am finding a lot of them seem to communicate that way instead of a simple phone call. I have called them and left msgs and some don't even bother to return the call until a few days or even weeks later. Oh well...

  Longhairgal: I feel the same way. I find it interesting that I can a part of your little email list of nonsense, but no real communication.