deivorce

undercover

Hey UM, I replied to the thread that you resurrected but here's the post again:

Welcome Unhappily Married

Assuming that you want to remain irregular, or better yet, inactive:

You can divorce without getting DFd...except neither of you will be free to remarry in the eyes of the congregation.

DO NOT go get laid outside the marriage just to force her into divorcing you. That will end up in DFing and alimony/child support. I've known a couple of people who went this route and it backfired. Not worth it.

Just get seperated, fade from the religion and then when you're off the radar and most have forgotten you, file for divorce. Then when your legally free, go about your life on your terms. If you should strike up another relationship before the divorce is final, be very, very discreet. Better yet, keep your pants zipped until it all plays out.

snowbird

Yeah, welcome!

Tee hee hee at UC's final statement.

Sylvia

OnTheWayOut

Here was UM's initial post on another thread titled "Divorce" :

Here is my situation:

I'm a male JW and beeing married to a sister JW for over 10 years. But I have been irregular for many, many months.

* When we married, it was a big mistake. We don't get along and we fight all the time. We have 1 child.

* I want a divorce but do not want to get d'fd. I was d'fd 20 years ago and don't want to go through that again and hurt my parents, etc.

* If I commit Porneia, ie commit oral sex with a female, would this constitute grounds for my wife to divorce me?

* Are there any "loop-holes" that I can exploit?

PLEASE HELP!!!

I have to agree fully with Undercover. If you want a divorce, get a divorce. Use the truth about your marriage and get a legal divorce. You will have to face the "brothers" no matter what you do if you want to avoid the DF. Tell them you argue all the time and won't get remarried while you are not "scripturally free" to do so. Then don't tell them what you do with your love life after you are legally divorced.

yknot

Also review the publication the Elders review in matters such as these......(download link below)

http://www.4shared.com/file/62487460/676fa4ef/1991-Pay-Attention-Elders-Manu.html

Sorry things didn't work out.....

Finally-Free

Better yet, keep your pants zipped until it all plays out.

Good advice. My lawyer told me that in Ontario it's not considered adultery if you have sex with someone after the date of separation, but that may not be the case everywhere. I advise seeing a lawyer before you do anything else.

Personally I think the whole process of separation and divorce is painful enough without the added complication of a relationship with anyone. For now let your right hand be your best friend.

W