Jehovah's Witness Protection Program
by AdaMakawee 6 Replies latest social humour
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AdaMakawee
I've actually found that nothing puts fear into the local Dubs eyes like telling them you're apostate.
Ok, I'm out.
LOL
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SirNose586
Funny sign, Ada!
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wobble
I think some of you clever guys on here could produce a downloadable sign for folks to stick in their porch or wherever to keep Dubs away
"No uninvited religious callers or literature here, thank you" or similar. A bit like the neighborhood watch signs we have in the UK.
Plus a big Watchtower symbol with a cross through it, or should that be a stauros ?
Love
Wobble
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thetrueone
What do you get when you cross a devil worshipper with a Jehovah's Witness? Someone who goes from door to door telling people to go to the lake of everlasting fire.
*I am a Jehovah's Witness of Borg. You will be assimilated to the slave class of a publishing empire in Brooklyn.
The first bloodless surgery was performed this week in which a kid who is a Jehovah's Witness got a new liver without a blood transfusion. The parents were so happy, they almost celebrated! - Jan McInnis
While traveling near Tampa, Florida I passed the "Jehovah's Witness Assembly Hall" and was struck by the fact that that must be where they make them. - Gene Spafford
My Avon lady just became a Jehovah's Witness. That may not mean much to you, but it saves me one more trip to the door. - George Carlin
I'm a Jehovah's Bystander. We's like the Witnesses, only we don't wanna get involved. - Flip Wilson
Why don't Jehovah's Witnesses get killed during an earthquake? They're always in your doorway. - Johnny Carson
I'm in the Jehovah's Witness protection program. I have to go around knocking on people's doors and telling them I'm somebody else. - Steven Wright
What do you get when you cross a Jehovah's Witness with an agnostic? Someone who goes door to door for no apparent reason.
What do you get when you cross Jehovah's Witness with a Mafia hitman ? Lots of converts.
Why do mobsters hate Jehovah's Witnesses? They hate all witnesses!
These Jehovah's Witnesses are sick of the 'turn the other cheek' way of spreading the word. Answer the door or else!
What does Hannibal Lector call a Jehovah's Witness? Free delivery! - Jay Leno (that one is a little over the top)
I could never be a Jehovah's Witness... I didn't see the accident. As far as I know, Jehovah didn't hit anybody. - Greg Taylor
The Jehovah's Witnesses sex scandal started its first day in court today. When they knocked on the door of the courthouse, nobody answered the door. - David Letterman
I saw justice in action today for the first time ever. I went out for breakfast this morning with my girlfriend, saw a Jehovah's Witness lock himself out of his own house. Kept ringing the bell. - Lou Eisen
Ask a Jehovah's Witness: If Jesus were in the hospital and needed an operation, could he get a blood transfusion from God?
I learned something the other day. I learned the Jehovah's Witnesses do not celebrate Halloween. I guess they don't like strangers going up to their door and annoying them. - Bruce Clark
Somebody was knockin' at my door the other day. I went to answer the door, it was a couple of Jehovah's Witnesses.
I said, "Yeah. What do you want?"
They said, "We're not interested." - Rodney Dangerfield
