by creativhoney 9 Replies latest jw friends
Ok so when I finally didnt care, I did attend a JC, but I wanted closure, deep down I actually wanted them to DF me. - has anyone else been in this scenario, and what did you say at your JC that ensured the right action was taken.
they asked me how I felt about my relationship with Jehovah - I simply said, I dont feel anything since I dont have one. I dont pray, I dont study, and I dont show much interest. I dont comment or go on the min...
that more or less did it.
Good for you taking the plunge. I presume you wanted to tell them to there face why you wanted out.
For others who may not know, all you need to do is send the elders a letter stating you no longer wish to be a JW. You don't have to go through a judicial hearing if you don't want to. It would go down that you dissassociated yourself which is the same thing as far as the elders are concerned.
Creativ- I can't speak from experience, but I think I like your approach. Let them know it means nothing to you. Everyone gets what they want
Once my fade is rolling in earnest, I plan to be on full ignore mode. No JC. No shepherding. Nada. The only thing they're going to hear from me is, "Thanks, but I just don't have the time."
I admire that approach as well. In my case, I definitely didn't want to be df'd but I was also not prepared to grovel or lie about anything. So when they asked me if I regretted my actions, I told them that in my opinion regret is a futile and negative emotion that I don't allow myself - learning from mistakes is much more important than wallowing in them....I think they didn't like that too much because their faces turned to stone and I knew right then that I had no shot at ducking the outcome. I also called them to task for ignoring me for a year and a half and offering zero spiritual help when I stopped attending meetings and it would seem that they didn't take too kindly to that either!
When you move in with someone that you're not married to, they df you pretty fast.
lol
Tell 'em you still believe in Jehovah, but you just don't trust the organization anymore. See how that goes.
A family member of mine was before a JC and they asked if he thought he had a drinking problem. He told them that he was probably going to be able to answer that question better when he wasn't drunk. They asked him to step outside so they could talk and he left and went to the bar.
He did not appeal.
tt
As stupid as it is I will tell you my story, embarrass myself if you will
I got divorced, the ex DA'd himself. My entire family are witnesses, just couldn't DA myself. So I started smoking. Dumb, I know. However, it did relieve the stress of the times.
For six months they kept having meetings with me, trying to get me to quit. I would go, say I would work on it and smoke in the car on the way home (nerves!) Finally at the last meeting I just said I didn't want to quit and they would just have to do what they were going to do and get it done and I left.
I don't regret being tossed out, however it is tough having no family, especially my two girls. I miss them terribly. Regret-no, anger-BOILING OVER!
Interesting how different elders take it. My wife told my elders (I was out of town) that she thinks it's a cult, does not believe in the GB, that this is NOT 'the truth', etc, etc, and the elders did nothing. Never heard from then since, literally, but never got DF'd.
