Chronicling the Highlights of Six Months Out

by Chaserious 9 Replies latest jw friends

  • Chaserious
    Chaserious
    I thought I would share a few highlights of my experiences over the last six months here, since I know you guys will understand, and I felt like organizing in writing a little. This week marks 6 months being officially out of the WTS, although it was about a year coming before that. Here are some of the things I have been able to do for the first time that I (and my wife in some cases) probably would not have been able to do otherwise! - Attended my first birthday party (our neighbor's daughter's 5th birthday!) - Started graduate school. I had that lined up before leaving, but still! - Joined a league softball team. - Joined a league adult kickball team! - Celebrated my birthday for the first time. I missed the first 27, but the 28th time was definitely a charm! - Associated with people from work outside of working hours (*Gasp* The horrors!) - Played beer pong at a party - My wife and I made a great team! - Stayed out until 2:00 with my wife and friends singing karaoke at a bar. No FS to wake up for the next morning! - Enjoyed every single beautiful summer weekend, not wasting even one by driving hours to a convention and staying in some overpriced, crappy hotel because it was on the WTS list. - Felt free for the first time! Granted, there have been some drawbacks also. I suppose I should mention them as well, to be fair. - I haven't spoken to my parents or sister, although I did leave a message once and send a text so they can't say I'm the one who cut them off. I let them know right upfront that my intention wasn't to cut off contact with them. My wife also has become estranged from her parents, one of her two brothers, and her nephew. - I have also lost my network of people to help me fix things. Since so many witnesses are in the trades, there was never a shortage of help if something went wrong with the house/car. Particularly my father-in-law used to be able to fix about anything for us. But on the bright side, it has made me learn to be a little more handy. I hung a new storm door and replaced a leaky pipe in the basement, projects I probably wouldn't have tackled alone before. =) - The last drawback I have to mention is not seeing a little girl my wife and I were very fond of from the congregation. We were good friends with her parents. They are a nice, generous and humble couple. But I had a several hour talk with the husband, and he is very much a WTS "company man". My wife especially had really looked forward to seeing the girl grow up, maybe eventually along with one of ours, and it's kind of sad. She was about 18 months old when we left. Anyway, overall it's been the best spring/summer of my life. I don't see any need for "deprogramming" or whatever. It seems to take care of itself. I've read Crisis of Conscience, and have no doubt of the destructive and intentionally controlling nature of the WTS organization. I haven't been a frequent poster here, because personally I don't feel the need to revisit the past often (though I understand why some do), but at this first milestone, I wanted to journal things a little. Thanks for reading!
  • The Oracle
    The Oracle

    Nice going Chaserious,

    Good for you! I was pretty pleased to get involved with organized sports as well. The birthday parties are fantastic too!

    Glad to hear you are adjusting well to life in the real world.

    I am certain that there are a lot more people like you out there who don't even post on boards like this, but I for one am glad you checked in. It's great for current JWs who check this site out on occassion to read posts like this.

    Thanks!

    The Oracle

  • wasblind
    wasblind

    Welcome to the land of the living

  • palmtree67
    palmtree67

    That was very nice to read!

    Thank you!

  • Out at Last!
    Out at Last!

    Congrats on the progress so far to both of you. You may be suprised at how much better you feel when you do revisit the past and put it down in writing. I don't know why, but when you write things down it purges your soul, plus it may help others who have felt or who are feeling the same things. The board works both ways, some there to help you, and you there to help others. You never can tell what an experience or how you are feeling will effect others.

  • I quit!
    I quit!

    I'm glad you're out and doing well. The drawbacks you mentioned are what keeps a lot of people in. The Watchtower has done brilliant job of making it very difficult for someone to leave. When leave you learn first hand what a house of cards the whole thing was. Your whole network of friends and services is packed up and yanked from under you in a minute but it is worth losing to get out from under the bondage of the Watctower. I can't tell you how many times I have been heading out to do something fun on a weekend and seen a group of Witnesses moping along with their book bags. You have to feel sorry for them. They are slaves but they could walk away from it at any time.

  • jamiebowers
    jamiebowers

    I

    have also lost my network of people to help me fix things. Since so many witnesses are in the trades, there was never a shortage of help if something

    went wrong with the house/car.

    There's a FaceBook page with names. locations. and skills of exjws. I'll try to find it.

  • Hadit
    Hadit

    Thanks for sharing your story. It's great to see people let go of the WT and live their life and be happy!

    Continued happiness to you both!

  • Chaserious
    Chaserious

    There's a FaceBook page with names. locations. and skills of exjws. I'll try to find it.

    Thanks for your comments everyone.

    @jamiebowers- I never imagined there'd be such a facebook page. The only thing is, I'd feel kind of bad since I don't really have any discernible skills myself to offer in return!

  • jamiebowers
    jamiebowers
    @jamiebowers- I never imagined there'd be such a facebook page. The only thing is, I'd feel kind of bad since I don't really have any discernible skills myself to offer in return!

    Well, don't worry, because I can't find it anyway.

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