This past weeks's column actually is the end of a series on Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (C-PTSD) that spanned from week 18-20. It includes a definition of C-PTSD as well as applications to our lives as Witnesses and ex-Witnesses and some techniques to help us through the recovery process.
C-PTSD differs from PTSD in that PTSD is most often the result of a one time experience. Dr. Herman defines C-PTSD as:
A history of subjection to totalitarian control over a prolonged period (months to years). Examples include hostages, prisoners of war, concentration camp survivors, and survivors of some religious cults. Examples also include those subjected to totalitarian systems in sexual and domestic life, including survivors of domestic battering, childhood physical abuse, and other organized sexual exploitation.
Trauma extended over a long period of time would have a deeper impact than a one-time experience. The effects can become deeply entrenched into a person's psyche to the point where they think the control is "normal" and didn't negatively affect them. This impact mcan make it all th emore difficult to identify as traumatic after a person leaves the controlling environment.
Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder and the Watchtower Society
Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder part two
The following columns deal with a wide range of the effects.
Alterations in affect regulation, including
- persistent dysphoria (inappropriate expression of feelings) Having spent years controlling how they express or repress emotional responses many people have difficulty in this area. For example they may laugh when sadness or anger would be the more appropriate response.
- chronic suicidal preoccupation Losing one's family, friends and religion can make one feel very isolated. After years of being told they are worth nothing and that God will destroy them, many feel hopeless and may see suicide as a way out. Some may still believe that if they die before Armageddon they may have a chance for the resurrection when they can be reunited with family.
- self-injury There are many ways to injure oneself -
- risk-taking behaviors such as car racing, ignoring health problems, promiscuous sex
- substance abuse, eating disorders, misuse of prescribed medications, alcohol or substance abuse
- cutting or other forms of self mutilation, unnecessary operations
- explosive or extremely inhibited anger (may alternate) The Watchtower Society does not permit expression of anger especially towards the Society. It is normal therefore for people to never have learned that there is a healthy way to express one's anger. Discovering how they have been lied to and manipulated can cause many to become obsessively angry at the Watchtower Society and at individual Witnesses.
- compulsive or extremely inhibited sexuality (may alternate) This is another area where the Watchtower Society has exerted its control even into the marital bedroom. Like many people who grew up with strict sexual rules, many people leaving cults experiment with their sexuality but don't have a good idea about sexual boundaries. Others become asexual especially if they are unmarried. As in many things others might be too afraid to leave behind the strict rules that had been imposed upon them.
Alterations in consciousness, including
- transient dissociative episodes Some people may block out the memory of part of their judicial committee. They can be traumatic especially if the vote forces you out and you are disfellowshipped.
- depersonalization (feeling like you aren't real) and derealization (feeling like what is around you isn't real) For those who were disfellowshipped or disassociated it would be common for them to experience either of these two.
- reliving experiences, either in the form of intrusive post-traumatic stress disorder symptoms or in the form of ruminative preoccupation (going over it again and again). Again judicial committees are traumatic experiences. Just the threat of what might happen could be enough in some people to trigger C-PTSD. Some people may continually go over discussions they have had with Witnesses or rehearse what they could say, or wonder how they got involved in the first place.
Alterations in self-perception, including
- sense of helplessness or paralysis of initiative There is little opportunity for self-expression and determination as a Jehovah’s Witness.. All life's choices must be examined in light of Watchtower Society teachings. Self-determination and self-efficacy are viewed as negative traits. Leaving the Witnesses often means that a person has not developed critical thinking and social skills required to deal with life in the real world. This can easily lead them to believe they are failures.
- shame, guilt, and self-blame A lifetime of being told you are not good enough, you don't do enough and more, more, more is required creates an identity that is shame based. Most Witnesses have been trained to "be on the watch" for Satan who is out to get them. Any weakness can only result in thoughts of self-blame and guilt.
- sense of defilement or stigma Being reproved is a sure way of feeling stigmatized. Even the threat could be traumatic if the possible outcome could result in discipline. Even if the elders never find out about certain transgressions the person would carry the guilty secret around inside them. But many also feel a certain stigma at telling others that they had been a Jehovah’s Witness or had been in a cult.
- sense of complete difference from others (may include sense of specialness, utter aloneness, belief no other person can understand, or nonhuman entity). In many ways cults foster this kind of specialness. Being an member of such an exclusive club has its perks. But at the same time it is fostering a sense of separateness from the world, it also fosters a sense of separateness from other Witnesses, especially if a person thinks they may be outted to the elders. Added to that is the erroneous belief that no one other than ex-Witnesses would understand their experience.
Alterations in perception of perpetrator, including
- preoccupation with relationship with perpetrator (includes preoccupation with revenge) It's hard to let go of the control the Watchtower Society had over our lives. We may find ourselves going over things said, especially in judicial meetings. When we discover the real truth about their so-called truth it is hard not to be angry at the deception and betrayal.
Alterations in relations with others, including
- isolation and withdrawal Betrayal is nasty. It makes it very hard for people to trust again. As a result many people withdraw from others before they can be betrayed again.
- disruption in intimate relationships Fear of further betrayal reduces trust and therefore complicates personal relationships. This can become even more complicated when the partner was never involved in the Witnesses -- they don't understand.
- repeated search for rescuer (may alternate with isolation and withdrawal) Despite the fear of betrayal some people will get involved in serial relationships hoping to find someone who will help/save them.
- persistent distrust Distrust can affect not only personal relationships but can also affect relationships in the workplace as well as with friends.
- repeated failures or self-protection An unending cycle of seeking and then pushing people away can lead many to feel even more damaged.
Alterations in systems of meaning
- loss of sustaining faith Many - not all - people find it difficult to get involved in any other religion. Spirituality often becomes redefined as a personal inner experience.
- sense of hopelessness and despair With so many disruptions in every part of a person's life it is easy to think the problem is with them rather than with the things they were taught and their experience with the Watchtower Society. Hopefulness and self-efficacy may seem impossible.
Each day over the following week addressed one of these effects. Hopefully many of you will see the impact in your lives and find some help in the information provided.
The last 3days I moved on to other issues:
What is Psychological Resilience?
A comment online the other day reminded me of the word resilience and how that applies to anyone who has experienced trauma or abuse of any kind. We often wonder why one person who has gone through so much and managers to not only survive but thrive and why another who doesn’t go through nearly as much gets lost along the way and sinks through the cracks of life.
Specific traits of a mature person
If you don't know what healthy adjustment is, how can you ever get there? The Watchtower Society was never invested in helping people mature and reach their true potentials. Maturity generally includes being knowledgeable, emotionally aware, self-directed, and at peace with the world. The following list may help you identify areas in your life that have stagnated under the watchful eye of the Watchtower Society and areas that may need further attention.
Symptoms Of Unhealthy Authority and Dependency Based Relationships
Adaptation from Alice Miller's For Your Own Good
Authority figures can be parents, partners, teachers, principals, supervisors, religious figureheads, cult leaders, etc. Dependents can be children, partners, students, employees, religious followers, etc. What matters is that there is a power imbalance and a dependence of some sort, whether physical, financial, "spiritual," psychological or emotional. In this case I am referring to the Watchtower Society and Jehovah’s Witnesses. You can draw your own conclusions regarding the “fit”.