Is being brought up a Jehovah's Witness child abuse?

by digderidoo 9 Replies latest watchtower child-abuse

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  digderidoo

  If you feel that it was abuse then why?

  Personally my parents became JW's when i was 13 so i never had the earlier years within the religion. But by being controlled so much during my teen years i would liken it to abuse. Being told not to bother with an education, being told where and when i could go anywhere in my late teen years and not doing the 'normal' teenage thing was abuse. Being repressed sexually was abuse. Not making my own mistakes and finding my own way was abuse. Being told that i could only go out with a girl if there was a view to marriage was abuse. In fact i'd say my whole teenage experience and my lost youth was abuse.

  But occasionally when i bump into an old friend who is still a JW, some have not had the negative experience that i have had. Some old friends i may bump into from time to time who are ex jw's also have not been as messed up as i did. So i do question whether the whole JW thing is abuse or was it just my experience.

  As i feel that my teenage years were abuse, does that therefore make my mother an abuser? Or was she just doing what she thought was right by her two sons? I still love my mother, there may still be a slight resentment still there for introducing us to the JW faith, although i will readily say that it was abuse i'm at odds to describe my mother as an abuser.....hope i'm making sense.
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  Bungi Bill

  Being a JW does not make for a family friendly environment.

  Having to to sit quietly through hours and hours of boring meetings, and even longer assembly programs, would even tax adult to the limits.

  - to expect this of small children is inhuman.

  - as is likewise dragging small children around in the field service; either in extreme heat (as in around here) or in extreme cold temperatures.

  This , added to Bible verses such as the one about "using the rod", makes child abuse all too likely to occur.

  From what I observed in my 28 years with them, I would say that the majority of JW children have been subjected to child abuse.

  The very best that could be said about the JWs is that it is not a family friendly religion, and it cares nothing for the welfare of its members.

  (Interestingly, according to Ray Franz in Crisis of Conscience, even the then WTS President N.H. Knorr agreed that the JWs do not look after the welfare of their people).

  Bill.
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  bottleofwater

  I agree. And it suppresses you from all sides. Limits your creativity.
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  new light

  Although I would never call my parents child abusers, being raised a JW is essentially child abuse. The effects are similar. Throw in a teenage disfellowshipping, as I had to live through, and the kid has a real struggle to find happiness. Distrust of others and a low standard for life quality are two big characteristics of the abused and those raised JW, especially those JWs who have enjoyed judicial reprimand.
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  Scully

  The religious indoctrination of children is child abuse, as is requiring children to participate in extremist religious ideology.

  Forcing children, from infancy, to sit through religious pontifications regarding porneia or masturbation is child abuse.

  Requiring children, from infancy, to trust anyone called Brother™ or Sister™ so-and-so just because they are JWs [even though they might be child molesters protected by Judicial Committee™ "confidentiality"], and distrust anyone else because they are not JWs, is child abuse.
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  THE GLADIATOR

  Although being brought up as a JW child is not ideal, I don't think it fair to accuse the parents of abuse. Parents that abuse their children, say sexually, know it is wrong and try to hide their activity. They will tell the child not to tell anyone what is happening and if questioned they will lie.

  JW parent are open about what they do and believe they are acting in the child's best interest. They believe they are giving the child the opportunity of everlasting life in paradise. Many other religions do the same.

  Though misguided, they often act out of love. Tragically the parents are victims of a sinister Society that has a history of lying to and misleading its membership. Like all parents, JW parents pass on what they have contracted to their unfortunate children.
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  Mad Sweeney

  The motivations, Gladiator, are a different topic in my opinion. Whether the abuse is intended or not doesn't make it benign; it is still abuse.

  The worst abuse, not mentioned here yet, is the knowledge JW children have that their parents would rather let them die than receive a blood transfusion. Only a born-in can understand how that feels. "If I get hurt and a blood transfusion would save me, mommy and daddy will let me die, they won't help."
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  THE GLADIATOR

  Mad Sweeney

  The motivations, Gladiator, are a different topic in my opinion.

  That's a fair point! I too had a harsh and regrettable upbringing due to my JW parents fanatical devoting to the Watchtower Society. It was never their intention to blight my life but nevertheless they did. The hours spent standing at doors going blue with the cold is something I still think of whenever it's cold.

  I see my parents as victims who did what they thought was best. That has helped me to judge them less harshly than I otherwise would.
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  Scully

  MadSweeney:

  The worst abuse, not mentioned here yet, is the knowledge JW children have that their parents would rather let them die than receive a blood transfusion. Only a born-in can understand how that feels. "If I get hurt and a blood transfusion would save me, mommy and daddy will let me die, they won't help."

  Yes, that is one of the worst forms of mental/emotional cruelty that JW parents inflict on their children. In a fortuitously ironic twist, most children of JWs are equally brainwashed to believe that it's the "right" thing to do, so the impact doesn't hit until the child starts questioning or doubting the belief system of their own accord, if that ever happens. But when it does happen, it's downright horrifying.

  http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/members/adult/202260/2/How-many-Wake-up-moments-have-you-experienced

  I think one of the worst "wake up" moments I've ever had - even far worse than the realization that the JWs beliefs are full of crap - was the day that it dawned on me that my parents would have gladly just let me and my siblings die sacrificed us had there ever been a situation where a blood transfusion would have been the only thing that kept us from dying.
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  OUTLAW

  Yes..

  .................. ...OUTLAW