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Band on the Run

Most Christian denominations have trouble with continued sinning when adultery occurs. Jesus' words in Matthew were clear. You seem more upset by the Witnesses not embracing you than your conduct. Unless, of course, there was a divorce first and a reasonable period of time elapsed. Yesterday, headlines were that Newt Gingrich's patriotism caused his many divorces. Have no fear, though voters, because he is now Roman Catholic. Despite his new religion, I wonder if Lloyds of London will insure this marriage.

Most Christians would also say that if repentence is present, it is a matter between God and the two of you. God was present, others were not. Wanting to remain a Witness is Stockholm Syndrome writ large. People keep pointing out Jesus main commandment, to love one another. You can find grace in Christ or you can be a Witness. You cannot control other people. Nothing you can do will change the minds of the Witnesses. Actually, I find the pure drama of your story unreal but others said that when I revealed my Witness history.

Even civil society condemns adultery. Jesus said to sin no more. Christ offers love. He repeatedly said to sinners, your sins are forgiven,sin no more. You are not interested in apostacy but you flee to an apostate site. Aren't you afraid we will infect you? Food for thought.

Can a leopard change his spots?

Band on the Run

Another thing I noticed is that your reunion with your former bf was almost instaneous in your account. Slow down, relax, you move too fast. How do you know this is true love now? Did you marry the others so quickly, too? Therapy would be helpful in sorting out this mess.

headisspinning

Well, first of all, although I have not written about the horrible guilt we feel, that doesn't mean that it's not there. And trust me, we will pay the price for what we did for the rest of our lives, just like King David. The point of my story is that we are sorry and we are repentant. As I've said before, we deserved to be removed from the congregation but even our ex-spouses and our children have expressed their desire that we be restored.

I do believe that Jehovah has forgiven us. We pray every day telling him how sorry we are and I know that he understands better than any human could. At the same time, we would like to be reinstated, even if it's just for the sake of our children.

Also, I want to say that my ex husband and I were separated for two years before I moved onto a new relationship. I know that is still considered adultery on my part, but I just want to be clear about that. And yes, my present husband did leave his wife which definitely hurt her and he feels terrible about it.

As I've said before, I didn't know the nature of this website when I first came across it. I took it for a mixed bag of people and I was actually trying to find someone with insight or experience in dealing with a situation like ours. And no, I'm afraid of being 'infected'.

The one thing I can assure you of is that reuniting with my former boyfriend was the right thing for me personally, if you can separate that from all the chaos it's caused, which is probably hard to do. But if I know anything, I know that we are made for each other and he feels the same way.

And thank you for the suggestion of therapy but I'm already in my fourth year. My therapist is wonderful and he has been incredibly supportive and non-judgmental through this entire 'drama' as you put it. The thing is, my life has been a drama since I was born so this is really nothing new to me. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger are words that I firmly believe.

wasblind

Psalms 103:12

" As far off as the sunrise is from the sunset, so far off from us he has put our transgressions "

Headisspinning,

you have already asked for forgiveness from the one who matters

he is the only one who can read the senserity in your heart.

When you return to the KH, you will find that many will not excercise psalms 103:12 towards you

they will also act as if they can read your heart. I wish you the best In whatever you strive for

palmtree67

Headisspinning,

I never really thought about the effects of the disfellowshipping arrangement until I was df'ed. (I still am, both me and my man.)

Our situation was similar to your's. We quickly worked to correct things.

Yet it means NOTHING to the congregation.

We are not presently doing anything that either of us should be df'ed for. But if we started going to meetings again tomorrow - it would be another 1-2 yrs before we would be reinstated.

Does that seem right to you? If God forgives, why can't they?

wasblind

Palm

I'm so glad that you decided to move on and enjoy your life

instead of wastin' precious time jumpin' hoops, waitin' on

a group of men to decide if your repentant enough, what

a waste of precious time that would have been.

And just think, the ones in the cong, who have never been d"fed

are made to feel that they are not worthy becuase they are not doin' enough

headisspinning

To PalmTree

Yeah, it is a real eye opener. Especially for my husband because he was an elder and he really had no idea what it was like to be on the other side of the fence.

I don't think a lot of elders even appreciate the impact they have on peoples' lives. Maybe some of them don't really care either.

jwfacts

Regardless of what you did or how repentant you are, the religion has not right to come between you and your relationship with your children. That should be up to them to decide, without interference from elders and religious leaders.

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