Top 10 count down why dubs go to the Kingdom Hall

by William Penwell 7 Replies latest jw friends

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  William Penwell

  Here's my top ten reasons why JW's attend Kingdomhall!!! Whats your top ten?? Can anyone add to my list?

  10. To catch up on your sleep.
  9. To practice your used car saleperson smile.
  8. To pick up your weekly supply of toilet paper.
  7. To keep up on local JW gossip.
  6. To Practice your brown nosing techneques.
  5. Only place you can hear a guy that can't run his own affairs get
  up on the platform and tell you how to run your affairs.
  4. Hear what "new light" the WTBTS has made up.
  3. Hear what "new light" the WTBTS is now saying is "old light".
  2. To see who needs an "additude adjustment" and rat out on them.
  1. Good place when you have nothing else to do to waste a couple of
  hours of time.

  Will

  "I am quite sure now that often, very often, in matters concerning religion and politics a man's reasoning powers are not above the monkey's."
  Mark Twain
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  DakotaRed

  10. To keep up on JW gossip

  09. The recive spiritual pablum

  08. To keep up on JW gossip

  07. To try to impress some horny JW teenage girl.

  06. To keep up on JW gossip

  05. To show off new clothes

  04. To keep up on JW gossip

  03. To reinforce their thought that anyone they personally dislike will be annhilated at armmegedon

  02. To keep up on JW gossip

  01. To ride around in service in Brother Better Than You's new Mercedes, like people seeing you think it is yours anyway.

  If God's Spirit is filling a Kingdom Hall, how is it that Satan can manuever the ones within that Kingdom Hall at the same time?
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  Marilyn

  1. It's easier than making up feasable excuses to brother busybody who calls coicidentally after each missed meeting.
  2. To witness first hand the hypocrisy of certain elders; do as I say not as I do.
  3. To get use out of knee length skirts in wardrobe.
  4. To get giggles at frightful verbal mistakes made by the more humble ones.
  5. To get aching butt.
  6. To hear how many different ways the same old, same old can be presented.
  7. So they won't die at Armeggedon.
  8. To illustrate (doodle) over small piece of paper found in book bag.
  9. To encourage new ones into the same pattern of misery as them.
  10. To complain about all aspects of the meeting on the way home in the car.
• 

  LB

  10.. cause I'm an idiot

  
  Never Squat With Yer Spurs On
• 

  kpax

  1. To observe little girls!
  2. To make sure you have no free time what so ever!
  3. To listen to talks we heard 1000 times before.
  4. To tape all the speeches.
  5. To give all you got to the only good charity, who gives nothing in return when in need.
  6. To listen to a 6 year old speaking wise words for 5 minutes.
  7. To hide within the enemy.
  8. To get ALL the privilages when the other brothers forget theirs.
  9. To paint people who pose perfectly still for 2 hours.
  10. Who knows? Their is no real reason we should go.

  Kpax
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  refiners fire

  1)So you can check lindas legs out of the corner of your eye while sucking on your biro and trying to look pensive.

  2)So you can eyeball Rubys ass when shes walking down the aisle in front of you and try to burn it into your memory so you can see it anytime you want.

  3)So you can sit behind Carol and keep checking the hair where it touches the side of her neck in that sweetest way.

  4) So you can, just for a moment, brush your foot against Wendys when you shift position in your seat.

  5)so you can get just a whiff of Leslies perfume when she wafts past you at the magazine counter.

  6)So you can hear the sound of Julies nylons when they rub against each other as she changes leg position in the seat next to you.

  Basically so you can snatch glances at all the girls you like,making sure your eyes arent there when they snatch glances at you.
• 

  Simon

  did you ever go to my hall refiners fire ?
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  moman

  10) To see if my back pain is gone.
  9 ) To work up an apetite for lunch.
  8 ) To catch-up on my sleep.
  7 ) To check out the foxes.
  6 ) To catch up on my worldly reading ( mag. should fit into watchtower)
  5 ) To practice my Dub haughtiness.
  4 ) To wonder why I'm here.
  3 ) To practice Yoga.
  2 ) To check out the foxes (again)
  # 1 reason to go to the Kingdumb Hall is:
  TO SUFFER FOR GOD!