forget it

by jerome 8 Replies latest jw experiences

  • jerome
    jerome

    I would like to ask ew-jws jw a question

    When you read the book crisis of conscience how instrumental was that book in getting you to leave the organisation.

    I have a gf who is an active jw...

    I by the way am wordly

    this religion thing is putting strain on our relationship.

    She condems me for obtaining information about the watchtower from apostates or just about anyone who has something yo say about the org

    oh by the way she claims she loves me

    I have pratically begged her to read this book so inactuality
    this relationship could depend on what this book has to say

    so i need to know how it made you feel when you read it

    i cant rest too much hope in it if it wont convince her that the GB is not what they claim to be.

    I need an honest anwser pleae

    Do you think she would look at the book and consider everything in it a lie
    or just like lock up and give the book back to me after just reading a few pages.

    thanks for your help

    ------------------------

    ps
    also how good is
    the companion book
    in search of christian freedom...
    can it plant that seed of doubt that will grow into objectivity.

  • Joyzabel
    Joyzabel

    Welcome to the board Jerome.

    If your girlfriend will not listen to you state things that she thinks you got from apostates, then there is no way she is going to read a book written by apostates.

    The mind control that the Watchtower Bible & Tract Society has over their people is very strong and doesn't respond to reason.

    Sometimes it is best to help her see the control this organization has over her and other JW's by pointing out unChristlike behavior if she complains about someone or something. Otherwise, her guard will be up to not listen and you won't be able to get through.

    For those jws who already have doubts and concerns over what they have personal seen or experienced, reading COC may have helped those take their blinders off. But the blinders won't come off until the individual themselves are looking for the answers that COC may give.

    j2bf

    sorry, still can't spell, had to fix the errors.

  • Mister Biggs
    Mister Biggs

    Okay, this is the third time you posted this thread.
    What's wrong with you, chief?

    So many stupid people, so few comets! :o)

  • jerome
    jerome

    theres a problem with my browser so when i click back sometimes the message is posted again

    i'm sorry about that

    mabe someone in controll could delete

    so dont label me as a troll or nothing it was just a mistake

    so if you could ask someone to delete one of the threads i wouldent mind not at all

    i dident even realize that this same thread was posted twice

    ok im sorrw

    the same mistake was made when i posted

    my gf is a jw

    you will notice that sometimes the same message appears twice
    i may have to go back and erase some of them myself

    dident mean to cause any trouble

    i hope this same message here that i am posted dosent repeat

    yet again my opolgies

  • Beck_Melbourne
    Beck_Melbourne

    Jerome

    I don't think your girlfriend is a very 'strong' witness...she can't be if she has a worldly boyfriend. This is a good thing...as you can wear her down eventually. I would suggest you avoid trying to influence her thinking so directly...offering her a book written by 'apostates' will only push her away from you. She will find your interest in so called apostasy disturbing. I would suggest you try more subtle means...as you can introduce the seed of doubt in other ways. She obviously still has some faith...despite the fact that she is in this relationship with you. Keep in mind that she is probably getting a lot of pressure from witness friends/relatives about this relationship...OR...she is secretly in this relationship....which means she possibly has a lot to lose if she were to come out in the open. I am making a lot of assumptions here...sorry...I don't know the whole story. But from what you've said I do think you have a good chance of getting her out of the borg....but you may have to employ some sneaky methods. Maybe some others out there may come to life with some suggestions...but the main one I can think of is to show her that you're NOT a bad associate (one who dwells with apostates)...and you can demonstrate this by your conduct. It is basically a teaching within the borg to witness to worldlies by one's conduct...do the same but from the other side. That way she may eventually be won over.

    Those are my thoughts.

    Cheers

  • target
    target

    Just leave the book out where she can see it. Don't mention anything about it. Make sure she is alone in the room with it for a bit. Her curiosity will get the best of her if she thinks no one is looking.

    Target

    PS. It had a big impact on me. It reallly helped my son decide to leave the borg.

  • Beans
    Beans

    Hey Jerome: Go to www.Quotes.JehovahsWitnesses.com and ask her a few questions about what is actually printed in there literature,it should freak her out.My buddie runs this site and he has gotten many people to think about things,he even got three elders to leave from the info in there own magazines!
    Beans

  • QuietOne
    QuietOne

    Jerome,

    You must be crazy for your girlfriend to be attempting to change her but if at all possible I'd forget the whole thing and move on.

    I too am not a witness and never have been. When I met my girlfriend she didn't mention the witness stuff for a long time and actually had not been active for many years. Everything was perfect and we eventually ended up having a child. We had agreed before hand that the child would not be raised a witness. Well... she has changed her mind entirely and now my life is hell (figuratively).

    My point is that even though many leave they still hold the beliefs to be true and in many if not most cases I figure it's impossible to shake them. I've had witnesses come to the door on Saturday (for the benefit of my gf), had them in to explain their views and even though I have shown weaknesses in the points they are making they eventually say something to the effect that my questioning (more like poking holes in their beliefs) has made them feel stronger in their conviction. They are devoid of reason when it comes to their beliefs. Black, white, truth, lie... To question their faith is to question God himself.

    All religions offer their believers a hope for something existing when we die. The real truth is that no one will know for sure what happens when we die until we make the trip ourselves. For witnesses that hope is more tangible than any other religion I am familiar with... living forever in a paradise on earth... some people need to know that this is what is going to happen, my girlfriend does and nothing I or anyone else says or doese is going to change that. To take that belief away she would have to come to terms with the fact that she might never again see her family and friends that have already died. Why would she want to take away a warm, fuzzy feeling like that?

    Sorry if I sound bitter but the simple fact is that I am! Trust me Jerome even if she leaves there is no garentee that she won't go back. What if you have kids? Would you want them raised as JWs? I have friends that are witnesses, they're great people and I enjoy their time but after researching a little bit I always wonder if they don't stay friendly with a worldly guy like me in the hopes that one day they will be able to start a bible study. You know this is always on their mind... they love penciling in all those study hours on their little witness calendars.

    Cut your losses and leave now.
    QO

  • SEAKEN2001
    SEAKEN2001

    Jerome,

    I have to agree with QuietOne. You might consider laying it on the line and tell her that if she continues to support the cult you will walk away. Of course, it depends on you and how deeply you rely on her companionship. She could be on her way out, many have left and do not look back. But there is also the possibility that she will go back like QO said. There are no answers here, only possibilties. You'll have to decide if you want to take the risk. Be open with her and honestly tell her how you feel. Better to find out now how she will respond than to pacify her and end up hitched to a cult fanatic.

    On the other hand, many JW's are kind and generous people, even if they are ignorant of reality. If you can live with an understanding that you will never connect mentally than you may decide to nurture the relationship. There are worse things than being the mate of a JW. Some of us have no choice. It sounds to me like you do have this choice so carefully weigh your options.

    Sean

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