Bemused...

by dozy 5 Replies latest jw friends

  • dozy
    dozy

    Got chatting to an old JW friend last night that I haven't spoken to for years & caught up with a lot of old gossip. He is still active - high-up - knows the fault lines in the JW system but stays because he "doesn't know where else to go" & it works ok for him & his family. Whatever floats his boat... Anyway........he told me a piece of news that totally floored me...

    A JW in London has run off with another sister & been DFd. Yes - I know - nothing new there. But this man & his wife when I knew them 30 years ago were the archetypal genuine pioneer couple. In fact , they spent ages in the ministry and helped all the young ones , including me. If it hadn't been for them , I would probably have drifted out in my late teens , like so many other young ones. And they were the original "joined at the hip" couple who were devoted to each other - almost like childhood sweethearts. They sold everything up , moved to a remote part of the UK , helped form a congregation.

    And it wasn't as if he was a young horny guy looking for a bit on the side. The guy is now is his mid 60's - he'd need industrial strength viagra. In fact , the JW told me that this brother didn't really "run away" with another woman - he kind of hobbled after her.

    His wife is devasted. And I'm really puzzled. Hey - I know all marriages go through ups and downs. But what exactly was the point of all those years of ministry? Where was the "putting on of the new personality" - the keeping of the marriage vows - the moral standards of JWs that the WTBTS keep on telling us that are so superior to "the world"? The brother would spend over 100 hours a month - it was his personal unofficial target.

    The brother also told me about another couple who have split up after 25 years of marriage - 2 grown up kids - both JW.

    Is it because the WTBTS emphasises & promotes "the ministry" (ie distributing their publications & recruiting new publishers) above all else? Is it an overall decline in morals that is impacting on JWs?

    Anyway - sorry to vent. Just bemused - that's all....

  • journey-on
    journey-on
    And it wasn't as if he was a young horny guy looking for a bit on the side. The guy is now is his mid 60's - he'd need industrial strength viagra. In fact , the JW told me that this brother didn't really "run away" with another woman - he kind of hobbled after her.

    Early onset Alzheimer's and lots of money? (From an inheritance, most likely...too much time in the ministry to earn much.)

    Or, he may have awakened rather late in life, felt like he had had enough, and wants to spend the rest of his days living an authentic life.

    Some of those JW marriages look like storybook relationships on the outside, but are unfulfilling and hellish on the inside!

  • Bella15
    Bella15

    It happens in the best of families around the world - LOL!!! DITTO: "Some of those JW marriages look like storybook relationships on the outside, but are unfulfilling and hellish on the inside!"

  • J. Hofer
    J. Hofer

    spending so much time for a printing corporation doesn't help in building a real relationship. weekends should be for family and friends, not for knocking on stranger's doors.

  • wobble
    wobble

    Hey wotchermean, "hobbled aftet her" ? I am in my sixties and I can still chase the girls, its just that when I catch one I can't remember what I chased her for !

    Any relationship can easily be more frail than it looks to us looking in from the outside, perhaps the guy got fed up with forty years of the missionary position !

    I bet there was a bit of two-way traffic in this too, the lady he hobbled after must have sent out some signals.

  • Diest
    Diest

    Lol Wobble....you sound like a domesticated cheetah!

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