Hi George,
I read your story and just felt my guts start tying themselves into a knot.
Your situation is heartbreaking, and I hope you soon find a respite from your difficulties.
No matter the religious affiliation, if any, of people involved in such egregious conflicts - even those NOT using the court system as weapons - these situations are ghastly.
When the players involve JW's, though, things get very macabre:
- a JW can't sue anyone in "good standing", even if there is a legitimate reason, or their butt gets kicked out of the org. On the other hand:
- Suits involving non-jw's, however, are encouraged! One less thing for the fearless, hapless wonks managing the myriad chaos in their congregations to contend with!
- The courts are there as "God's ministers on earth" and therefore, use them to the extent possible! Especially when it comes to extortion and slander! (Those worldly types - esp. ex-jw's who are now "vomit" and such, deserve what they get.)
- Use of the courts and current laws allows people a certain emotional detachment. Your (YOU, GEORGE, for example) well-being is not their concern anymore. Justice, or fairness, or ethics about the issues are incredibly germane to understanding the entire context of your situation, but consideration of such things is now in the hands of the COURT SYSTEM, and is now OUT of THEIR hands.
- (biased generalized parodized assumption here but I'll bet a kazillion bucks a lot of people reason such ways)And anyway, if you were still an "active jw", none of this would be happening to you. Bad things happen when you go back to the "world" and become Jehovah's enemy!
- All questionable behavior on the part of any JW is disavowed by any legal entity representing the WTBTS; directives are NEVER given by leadership, only "suggestions" or biblical "principles" are given. If the rank and file member goes berserk and proceeds to commit acts which are frankly imo tantamount to murder, well, don't blame the "mouthpiece."
George, I frequently wonder about the way things are sometimes. Sometimes it just keeps piling up so deep that one may wonder if they're some kind of target or magnet for screwed up junk. All of your collective emotional responses to being treated so unfairly tag along when the NEXT crappy thing happens, and your inner resources for dealing with things one at a time get at the "fume" level. I sincerely hope that you get some support and true compassion soon, and that you can get a chance to collect yourself. If I were in your position...... I don't know how you've held up the way you have for so long.
The IT field is currently glutted with extremely talented individuals who are streaming out of countless failed dot coms. People who are currently employed are being denied traditional bonuses or even reasonable cost of living increases in their salaries. I know so many people - talented, professional, GOOD people - who were laid off this past year in this field; I live with one and see everyday his serious efforts to find a position that won't cost him his dignity. Your creative efforts to find other ways to use your talents are to be praised.
A good lawyer might help - I for one would be very interested to see what results if you DO find one and if it helps you. It certainly seems as though a kind advocate would be immensely helpful for you. A judge is conditioned to bombardment with an endless stream of desperately complicated, emotionally beleaguering cases, and has no recourse but to view things with very thick skin and apply the letter of the law, at the expense of the "spirit" of the law. A judge hears a mere summary of the "facts" of a matter in just a few minutes and has to decide right then how to get this thing off of the court docket; it's not an arena where mitigating factors or personal circumstances can be taken very deeply into consideration.
Please let us know how things progress for you, and please know you have my concern and compassion.
lauralisa
